A MAJOR UPDATE to the bullying situation affecting my son with #Autism 

It’s been a rough few days and I’m just getting over being sick. There’s a lot I need to catch up on and that’s going kinda slow at the moment.  On top of that, pretty much everything that could go wrong, did go wrong today but that’s another entry. 

Having said that, the one thing that hasn’t been back burnered is addressing Elliott’s ongoing issues with the kid that’s bullying him at school. In fact, I’ve been dealing with that every day since it’s come to light. 

This morning I met with the office staff at the boy’s school and had what my old business partner would call a come to Jesus meeting. 
It seems like communication within the school is breaking down somewhere because every time I talk to someone who should be aware of the problem, they seem to be hearing it for the first time and are greatly upset that this has been happening to Elliott. 

I love this school and most of the staff but I do find that frustrating, if I’m being honest.  

Having not received a response from my strongly worded letter to Elliott’s teacher, I had a spur of the moment sit down with the principal. I explained that this kid is still continuing to bully Elliott, regardless of my attempts to work with the teachers. 

I explained that I’m done with this whole thing and that I will hold the teacher personally responsible for anything this kid does to Elliott, while inside the classroom under his supervision. I’m not a teacher but it seems that having two teachers for maybe a dozen kids in the class, would afford them at least some ability to ensure this kid stays the fuck away from Elliott.

I know these are kids with special needs but how difficult would it be to move this kids desk away from Elliott or even better, move him next to the teachers desk. 

What do I know?  I’m just a parent, not a teacher but I do have a little something called commonsense. Commonsense seems to be sorely lacking here. 

Anyway, before I go off on a tangent….. 

The principal has called a mandatory meeting for all the teachers at 7:45 am and he wants Lizze and I to be there as well.  If this doesn’t get everyone on the same page and unified in their response to the bullying, I don’t know what else will. 

I know most of the staff well enough to know they’re good people and they truly care about the kids they’re helping shape. This isn’t a bad school at all but I get the impression that not all the teaching staff is up to snuff. What do I mean by that? Is there a polite way to say some teachers are lacking a backbone?

No one is expecting perfection, least of all me. I do expect that my child is able to attend school without being physically and/or verbally assaulted each day. 

Lizze and I are going into this meeting with an open mind but a singular purpose and that purpose is to ensure the safety of Elliott.

Rob Gorski

Full time, work from home single Dad to my 3 amazing boys. Oh...and creator fo this blog. :-)
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Kim Gebhardt

Hopefully this meeting can get you somewhere. I am still super curious how 2 teachers can’t control a room of fewer than a dozen children. This honestly makes zero sense to me. And I want to throw something else out there… I don’t doubt that Elliott is having troubles with this kid, but is there a chance that he is overreacting? You’ve said that he is a very sensitive and very anxious child, is it possible that he is making a mountain out of a molehill?

JR

Glad it seems things are headed in the right direction. Good luck with your meeting. This seems to me to be less about teachers not having a backbone, but rather more about a lack of protocol or an inability to follow it with respect to this type of situation.

And I’ll say it one more time for good measure, since you mentioned a communication breakdown. Don’t rely on school staff to communicate with each other and don’t presume that they will communicate with each other. Take it upon yourself to include everyone in your communications (like copying all relevant personnel on letters like the one you sent), not as a threat, but rather, just to “keep everyone in the loop.”

Good luck. I have some personal experience in this area, so I get it.

Rob Gorski

I want to thank you for taking the time to share your insight and experience. I’ve fallen behind on comments while I was sick but I really do appreciate your feedback. ☺

Kim Gebhardt

Hopefully this meeting can get you somewhere. I am still super curious how 2 teachers can’t control a room of fewer than a dozen children. This honestly makes zero sense to me. And I want to throw something else out there… I don’t doubt that Elliott is having troubles with this kid, but is there a chance that he is overreacting? You’ve said that he is a very sensitive and very anxious child, is it possible that he is making a mountain out of a molehill?

JR

Glad it seems things are headed in the right direction. Good luck with your meeting. This seems to me to be less about teachers not having a backbone, but rather more about a lack of protocol or an inability to follow it with respect to this type of situation.

And I’ll say it one more time for good measure, since you mentioned a communication breakdown. Don’t rely on school staff to communicate with each other and don’t presume that they will communicate with each other. Take it upon yourself to include everyone in your communications (like copying all relevant personnel on letters like the one you sent), not as a threat, but rather, just to “keep everyone in the loop.”

Good luck. I have some personal experience in this area, so I get it.

Rob Gorski

I want to thank you for taking the time to share your insight and experience. I’ve fallen behind on comments while I was sick but I really do appreciate your feedback. ☺