If you’ve followed my journey over the years, you know that I’ve been through a lot with my kids and my kids and I have been through a lot together. It’s just part of life and we all go through things that are difficult. Some of us, more than others.
I know many of you are struggling and maybe struggling in silence, meaning no one knows about your struggle. While I’m not walking in your shoes, I do understand what that’s like. I wanted to take a few minutes and offer some words of encouragement because I’ve been there and I’ve found my way through it.
If I step back and just look at the last couple of years I’ve been on this endangered plant, I’ve had some dark days. I lost my last two grandparents, went through two seperations, a divorce, 15 months of COVID lockdown, two years of remote learning, and raising my kids alone. All of this while warring with depression, and trying to grow and maintain a business. If I told you that there was never a day I wanted to give up or sink into dispair, that would be an outright lie.
There were many days I wanted to quit because I was so tired, overwhelmed, frustrated, depressed, lonely, in pain, scared, feeling like a complete failure, and couldn’t find a path forward. Not giving up was one of the hardest things I’ve ever managed to do. If I hadn’t had my kids, I don’t know where I’d be right now. I prefer not to think about it to be honest. There were plenty of days where they were the only reason I got out of bed in the morning. They were the only things keeping me going.
After some rough years, therapy, personal growth, rediscovering who I am, and realizing that I am many things, but a failure isn’t one of them, I found my path forward. The path had always been there, I just wasn’t ready to see it.
Fast forward to 2021 and I’m living my best life. I’m happy, healthy, at peace, I’m taking care of myself (both emotionally and physically), my kids are doing amazingly well, and I’m in an most incredible relationship. I’ve discovered a better balance in life and now maintain a healthy level of privacy. Work is recovering from the pandemic and the podcast is doing really well. I’m working hard to build a better future for all my loved ones and for the first time in my life, getting older doesn’t scare me.
Gavin is even planning on moving out on his own and that just blows my mind. I’m so proud of him. The boys are back at school, doing well, and discovering who they want to be. I’m so proud of them as well.
I’ve said this before but if you’d told me a year ago, that I’d be where I am today, I wouldn’t have believed you. It just goes to show that you never know what’s around the next corner and if you give up, you might never find out.
I know it’s not easy and as good as things are right now, my life is far from perfect. I’m rebuilding a business, recovering financially from divorce, and still working on myself. I carry baggage that I’m learning to finally put down and move forward less burdened by my past. It’s a process but I have the love and support of some amazing people to help me when I need it.
I’m so lucky to be where I am and it’s only getting better as time moves forward. If I had quit, or given up, I might not have found this place in my life. My kids might not be where they are either. For that reason alone, I’m so grateful I kept finding a way to get back up, and continue moving forward.
Life does get better but not if you quit. When you get knocked down, find the strength to get up one more time. Do worry about falling again in the future, deal with that in the moment, if or when it ever happens. Just focus on this moment, get back up and take a step forward. Get help if you need it and never be ashamed to need it.
You got this. I believe in you. You just have to believe in yourself.