Read more about the article The very first day of my 37th year
My thoughts

The very first day of my 37th year

Today's been pretty okay so far. The boys have way too much energy but everyone is getting along just fine. That's a largely positive thing.  We have zero plans for today and I'm okay with that because frankly, I'm pretty tired. I slept kinda strange last night and woke up feeling like I hadn't really slept at all.  It's fair to say that I have a lot on my mind and I'm preoccupied with Gavin's trip to the Cleveland Clinic in the morning.  Either way, I'm going to make the best of today. I want to start the first day of my 37th year on the right foot. 😀   

9 Comments
August 24, 2015
Read more about the article If you feel like quitting, read this before you do
My thoughts

If you feel like quitting, read this before you do

When things get tough emotionally and/or physically, it's easy to want to give up but it's so important that you don't. Today I turn 37 years old and will be doing so without my wife being by my side for the first time in almost 15 years. That's a bitter pill to swallow, at least for me it is.  Yesterday we celebrated the August birthdays in my family with a cookout at my parents house. Truthfully, I didn't really want to go because I knew I wouldn't be in the mood to be around people but the kids weren't going to pay a price for my mood so we went.  It was a rough start and I avoided contact with everyone I could.  Eventually though, things got a little easier…

39 Comments
August 24, 2015
Read more about the article Yeah, this is working out so well 
Divorce / My thoughts

Yeah, this is working out so well 

I'm so not in a place to be around people right now. I tried but it's just not working out for me. Everything is setting me off because I'm so incredibly sensitive at the moment. People don't always realize how painful the end of a marriage can be for a husband who's heartbroken.  I removed myself for a bit to write because I was seriously going to explode. Not holding out much hope right now of salvaging the day. Not sure if I'm going to make it the entire time...  💔   

24 Comments
August 23, 2015
Read more about the article We’re off to celebrate my birthday
Divorce / My thoughts

We’re off to celebrate my birthday

It's been a really good morning so far. Okay, actually I meant afternoon.. 😜 Anyway, the boys and I will be off to my parents house for an August birthday's celebration. If you didn't already know, my birthday is in August and more specifically tomorrow.  The weathers beautiful out and the temperatures just right.  While this is going to be difficult for me on an emotional level, I'm damn sure going to make the best of it. While life has taken some unexpected turns of late, it hasn't stopped altogether and I need to move forward. 😀   

18 Comments
August 23, 2015
Read more about the article It can be so exhausting to be patient with your special needs child :(
Gavin / My thoughts / Parenting Frustrations

It can be so exhausting to be patient with your special needs child :(

It's heartbreaking but I have to reel in some of Gavin's independence:( Gavin's current capacity is such that I have no choice but to start taking away some of the independence he has earned over the last year.  I've said a few times recently that I'm seeing regression once again.  This is kind of the status quo for Gavin. He will do really well and then begin to regress again. Clearly this is an ongoing issue.  For most of the last year, I've had Gavin responsible for his medications, for the most part anyway. He would take them when it was time and most often remembered to do so on his own.  Last night he informed me that he had not taken his inhaler while at his Mom's house because…

3 Comments
August 23, 2015
Read more about the article I’m soooo tired this morning 
My thoughts

I’m soooo tired this morning 

I didn't get more than about 2 hours of sleep last night. My brain just wouldn't shut off and when I finally did fall asleep around 3am, Emmett was up at 4am. Tired doesn't even begin to explain how I'm feeling this morning.  I'm going to try to get a nap but I don't know if that will be possible...    

0 Comments
August 23, 2015
Read more about the article It’s gonna be emotionally difficult for me today
Divorce / My thoughts

It’s gonna be emotionally difficult for me today

My birthday is on Monday but because my family is so large, we sorta lump all the August birthdays together and celebrate on one day.  That day is today..  There's a great deal of emotion surrounding this me and I don't know if I'll be able to hold it together. I know life goes on and I have a lot of life to eventually get to but it's hard.  I don't know if this makes sense to anyone but I'm gonna try anyway.  I'm not hung up on my wife. I don't miss her, at least who she is now and I know from the bottom of my heart, that the boys and I are better off. I know that.  At the same time, I feel this tremendous loss that…

7 Comments
August 23, 2015