3 tell-tale signs I need help with my #Depression

I've been very open in regards to my ongoing war with depression. I feel that the only way we can de-stigmatize things like depression or any other mental health illness, is to speak openly, honestly and without shame. It's with the continued spirit of honesty, that I share with you my current struggles with depresion. I'm not going to go into my past history with depression in this post right now because honestly, this is hard enough as it is. You can however, read for yourself. See My War with Depression. In a nutshell, I'm not doing well. There are a few things that tend to happen when depression is kicking my ass. It's always been that way. As problematic and disruptive as these things can be, it's sorta like…

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What it’s like when I don’t cope well

I'm feeling incredibly overwhelmed this morning and I'm not entirely sure why. I've been feeling anxious and like there's just too much going on for me to cope with. I honestly can say that it isn't just one thing that weighing on me, it's the totality of everything. On most days, I'm able to take things on, one or two at a time and cope. On days like today, I taking on everything at once and it's crushing. This isn't something I'm doing on purpose or even consciously but the impact on me is significant. I'm literally shaking as I write this because I can't seem to center myself and it's more than I'm able to adapt to at the moment. I need to remove myself from the game for…

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1 more reason my heart is breaking tonight

I've talked many times about Gavin and his many challenges. I've confessed to being frustrated and overwhelmed by his behaviors on many occasions as well. It's no secret that everything he goes through is absolutely heartbreaking to me. I think it would be for anyone with a soul. One of the reasons that it's so heartbreaking for me is because while it's true that Gavin is blissfully ignorant of his challenge on most days, there are days he becomes aware of them. Yesterday was one of those days where my frustration got the better of me and it just happened to coincide with Gavin being aware of something he was struggling with. I don't remember everything that happened because frankly, there was just too much to remember but it basically…

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I’m looking forward to this week for 1 big reason

We're going into our third week of summer vacation and I'm really looking forward to it. I'm not looking forward to it because there's something amazing happening, in fact, it's quite the opposite. I'm looking forward to this week because there's absolutely nothing going on. We still have our regular, weekly appointments but there are no out of town trips and no doctors appointments that have the potential to go badly. So often we are bouncing from one appointment to the next, in a seemingly endless game of hopscotch. It's exhausting for all of us but it's especially hard on the kids. Our goal for this week is to have a low key, relaxing seven days because we start back up with out of town appointments next week. Our budget…

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2 things that have always overwhelmed me as an #Autism parent

There are so many things about being an Autism parent that can be overwhelming. Everyone's list is likely to be different but I bet there are at least a few overlaps. I thought I would share two of the most overwhelming aspects of being an Autism parent for me. For me, and I've said this a million times before, sensory processing challenges are easily one of the most overwhelming aspects of being an Autism parent. Sensory processing disorder impacts my kids in different ways. Generally speaking, SPD makes it incredibly difficult to feed, clothe, and even take my kids anywhere. They are very easily overwhelmed by sensory input. Things like taste, smell, sound, touch, and sight can often lead to overstimulation. This leads to the inevitable meltdown. It's not their…

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Sleep and #Autism Parenting

It was a long night and I'm exhausted. Lizze sent me back to bed and left me undisturbed until I woke up on my own. Thank you for that.. ☺ I will say that it's amazing how lack of sleep impacts, even after getting an extra long nap. Truthfully, I feel pretty good but at the same time, I'm also feeling drained. There's absolute truth to the notion that you cannot make up for lost sleep. You can get sleep after having lost some but it doesn't undo what the lost sleep did. I don't know if that makes any sense but I bet if you asked most Autism parents if getting an extra long nap undoes the previous nights loss of sleep, I bet most would say no. That…

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I was completely overwhelmed

I'm was feeling a bit overwhelmed this afternoon. When Lizze left with her Mom on Friday afternoon, my grandpa was still in the hospital but doing much better. The boys were doing great-ish and we were looking forward to our guy time. Unfortunately, things didn't go as planned. The boys and I had a blast watching Flight of the Navigator. All was well until bedtime when Emmett's occasional cough got worse and he couldn't sleep. It was a long-ass night. Emmett woke up coughing, hacking and running a fever. We made it through the night but didn't get much sleep. I was exhausted and not in a place to cope with much more. That's right about the time Gavin began having problems. He was having really bad reflux, which isn't…

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Poor Emmett is not doing well

It was a long night and I'm exhausted. Emmett is definitely sick and he's getting worse as time goes on. It began as an infrequent cough but now it's a fever and a cough. The cough is constant and dry. I don't think it's necessary to get him to the doctor as this is probably a cold but I'll be keeping a close eye on him.

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