I’m struggling a bit tonight

I'm getting divorced on Tuesday morning and there are a few things Lizze wanted from the house. It was kinda like a scavanger hunt because I couldn't find some of these things at first. After a few phones calls back and forth, I managed to locate most of what she was looking for. There are some items in the attic but they're staying there until I gut it, hopefully this spring. Anyway, I emptied my closet completely for the first time since she left and I came across quite a few memories that hurt to remember. They would otherwise be positive memories, and perhaps with time, someday they will be again. Everything is collected into about four or five boxes and they're just sitting in my room, waiting to be…

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My life will forever change next week but I’m going to be okay

I realized this morning that my marriage will officially be over in a week. I'm sure it will be the main topic in therapy this week. This whole thing is a mixed bag for me because letting go of something that was so important to me is incredibly difficult. There's a roller coaster of emotions surrounding this and as I'm laying here on the couch, listening to my kids kids playing upstairs, I'm getting emotional. I've been talking to my therapist about this a lot and last week, she was pretty blunt with me. She's a little concerned that while I may be doing okay right now, next Tuesday could be a very different story. I'm managing my depression as well as can be expected under all these insane conditions.…

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I’m getting divorced: What I’m grateful for and few other updates

The boys are still sleeping and Gavin's IVIG Infusion is going. The only noise I hear at the moment is the filter in the aquarium because the tank needs water added. It sounds like a water fall but not the calm, relaxing kind. It's super annoying and I will dump some water in when I'm done with this. After the inauguration, I just sorta crashed. Trump, COVID and my divorce, I have had me extremely stressed out and the last few days have been one long exhale. I figure there's no time like to present to get you an overdue update and so here I am. As I mentioned, the boys are still asleep. It's a no school day and I'm letting them sleep. Frankly, aside from the fish tank,…

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Communicating with my adult #autistic son

I've mentioned this a few times before but Gavin and I have a unique relationship. We're very very close and direct with each other. I've learned over 20 years that Gavin needs people to be very direct with him. If you give him any room to interpret the meaning in your words, he will often struggle to understand. That's just part of who he is and that's okay. From the outside, it can seem like I'm being mean but in reality, I'm not. If I used this approach with someone else, I might agree but sometimes we have to cater our approach to the needs of the person we're trying to approach. Here's an example of what I'm talking about. If Gavin is talking too much, which he's known to…

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A quick little update

The kids start back to school in the morning and we had a quiet last day of Christmas break. There wasn't a great deal of anything going on today and I'm totally okay with that. As the kids settle back into their school routine or as close to a routine as possible, I'll get back into my work schedule. Interviews start on the 14th and I need to get some things done before I launch season 4. I'm excited to get started though. Anyway, I wanted to share a couple of things from today. Neither are huge deals but it will round out this little update and close things out on a positive note. I didn't sleep well last night so I was up really early this morning. When I…

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We need to have a talk

So apparently I was on TV again over the last few days. I didn't know anything about it. My brother messaged me last night to say that he was going through the guide on his TV and he heard my voice in the background. He clicked over and BAM there I was. I guess is was a supercut from several of the interviews I'd given ABC News in 2020. I don't know because I haven't seen it. I had been hearing from people over the last few days that they'd seen me on TV as well. These are people I've never met before and they felt compelled to reach out after hearing me speak. Everyone was very nice and I love hearing from my readers/followers/listeners. What was a bit worrisome…

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Why the holidays are tough for us

One of the challenges for me as a Dad going through a divorce, is managing the holidays. I don't mean fighting over who gets to see who because thankfully we don't have that problem. I'm referring to things like simply navigating the day. Before all of this happened, we had our holiday traditions and everyone had a role to play. When people are missing, the role goes unfilled and it sometimes changes everything. We were in a remote location with no other people around. We took out masks off for the picture. This was earlier this in the Fall. Even if the traditional activities are still possible, there can be emotional baggage associated with them, especially for the kids. This is our second Christmas on our own and we're still…

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I’m really nervous about this

By the time you read this, we will likely be on the other side of this particular situation. In the morning, we have someone coming to service our furnace. Something is very wrong with it and it needs to get done or we won't have any heat. Normally this wouldn't be a big deal but since COVID, nothing is not a big deal anymore. I reached out to some medical experts I know to figure out the safest approach to having this done. After chatting for a little bit, it was concluded that assuming they actually wear a mask like I was promised they would, and we stay as far away as we can, while wearing our own masks, the risk should be low. The current plan is to have…

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