As an Autism parent for almost sixteen years, I can say that it's a stressful job. I've often said that it's 25/8/366 because of the nature of Autism.
I want to take a minute and share why it's so important for me to take time to myself.
For starters, I know that it's not always easy to physically remove myself from the equation because life has a way of making it so I'm always putting out fires. Plus, finding a sitter for three kids with Autism isn't an easy task.
None of the challenges associated with taking time for myself, negate the importance of it.
As someone who lives in a constant state of hypervigilance, I often feel like I'm on the brink of insanity. There's so much that goes into parenting a child with Autism and a great deal of it can revolve around constant repetition, managing meltdowns and about a million other things that serve to make life more difficult for my kids.
Sometimes I need to be benched for a little while in order to step back from the ledge and regain some balance.
It's not always easy and I know that. You may recall that I raised my three kids, entirely on my own for almost two years while my wife and I were separated. I know it's not easy but regardless of the difficulty, it's absolutely essential.
The most common way that I get time to myself is when I go to pick up the boys from school every day. I get to the school about an hour early and sit in the quiet. Sometimes I read. Sometimes I write and other times I literally set an alarm and close my eyes for an hour. I've even been known to bust out my Gear VR and play Minecraft.
What I do matters less than making the time to do it.
Simply being able to unplug, relieves enough stress and tension to help me make it to the next time I can take some time to myself.
The weekends are harder cause the kids aren't in school but I've learned to involve them in my taking of time for myself. That may seem counterproductive and sometimes it is, but I'm working with what I have to work with.
What usually happens is the boys and I will work on Minecraft together. Sometimes it's on the Xbox and other times it's in our family's realm, via our tablets.
I love Minecraft for this purpose because I have total control over my world and I can build or create whatever I want. It has a zen like affect and it really helps. The kids will join and we work together to build cities or towns. We love building underground bunker type things as well.
Minecraft is very immersive, especially in VR. It's like I go somewhere else and it works for me.
The whole point is this. If I don't take time to myself, I'm unable to sustain the level of parenting I need to sustain, in order to take care of my kids in the manner in which they deserve.
How do you take time for yourself? Do you even get time to yourself? Let's discuss this in the comments below and maybe we can come up with some ideas that may be helpful for everyone... ☺
