Dear cyberstalker

Dear cyberstalker,

At this point I’m choosing to protect your identity, and I’m very aware of who you are.

I’m going to make this polite and very public request one time and one time only. Cease and desist your harassment of both my wife and myself. Your comments are both ignorant and hurtful. You seem to be on a quest to disrupt my family and I won’t stand for it.

If you have an issue with anything that I have said or done on this blog, I would encourage you to contact me directly and discuss your concerns. I’m open to anyone’s opinions when they are presented in a productive and tactful manner. Thus far you have become an annoyance and your views and or opinions lose any and all credibility. I have not and will not censor any of your comments because I don’t believe in doing so.

I’m making the conscious choice to take the high road here. Please don’t mistake this for sign of weakness or an admission of guilt. If this continues I will not be so understanding and you should know that I’m very protective of those I love.

You have been warned.

So we’re clear:

Your comments are no longer welcomed and I ask that you exercise some self-control and refrain from making any further remarks. Your previous comments will remain public and I will at no point remove or censor them.

I wish you the best as I know your life is difficult. That said, this must stop.

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Annoymous

Wow, seems I’m not the only one “concerned” about you and your relationship with Gavin???

lostandtired

@Annoymous that’s true.  There are more trolls out there.  You don’t have that market corned just yet.  Have a nice day.

Michael

Just a quick heads up…when I am reading your blog, and I get part way down the page, where the giant globe is spinning, the blog gets cut partly off there, just where the globe is, then it continues, is there any way to move the globe?? I am using firefox latest browser if that helps, thanks..

PATSY NAPE

Rob, it never ceases to amaze me how insensitive and petty people can be.I have followed your blog for a long time, and I have never gotten the impression you were asking for anything from anyone. There isn't anything wrong with allowing people to bless others. Everybody should try it. Mankind would be in a lot better shape. You are right, unless you walk the walk you truly do not understand and should really find out what is like to walk in someone's shoes before making statements you don't have all the facts about. A person has to be able to vent frustrations. I'm a nurse and you have helped me to understand facts about Autism I never understood before. None of us are perfect parents. We have all made mistakes, but your doing the best you can and giving all you have. Most people would have ran along time ago.I know you love Gavin, and your comment's didn't mean you would not do your best to keep him with you. I had an Autistic cousin, and I care for geriatric residents and have some understanding. It is very hard for the family to accept there may be a time the best thing for them and their other family members, for their safety and well being, is to allow nursing staff that is specifically trained in caring for Autistic individuals to do just that. I hope it doesn't come to this for your family, but you are right, all things and persons have to be seriously considered here. God bless you and Lizzie.

Lost_and_Tired

Thank you so much

Lost_and_Tired

Thank you all for your support. SortOfConcerned is not the person this post was directed at. She is just someone voicing her opinions, which she is entitled to. Having said that, I will just say a few things because I'm not going to devote anymore time or energy than needed to her.

I don't want anyone, ever, to feel the need to donate to my family. My family is my responsibility. The reason the donate button is there is because before I put it there, people were trying to help by sending things in the mail and those things didn't always go to the right address. I felt that rather than have someone's genuine attempt at kindness be lost in the mail that I should provide a better way for those that want to help, to do so in a safe secure way. That's why it's there..

As far as Elliott is concerned, he was diagnosed by professionals and I actually didn't accept the diagnosis for quite sometime, but I think you already know that, don't you. Yes, I know who you are. If you were truly educated in what Autism is, than you would know that not everyone presents the same way. Elliott is very, very high functioning and doesn't present the same way as his brothers. His challenges are different but very real nonetheless.

As far as medical testing and hospital trips are concerned, we'll leave that to the medical professionals to decide. However, for the record, everything we do and have done or will be doing has been in our kids best interest. It's easy to sit back and armchair quarterback when you have absolutely no comprehension of what it takes to raise a special needs family.

Finally, I do post about our neighborhood because it's a huge problem. It's a problem, that I will be resolving in the quickest way possible. Until such a time that we are free from this place, I will continue to share the events that occur in our lives that have an impact on my family. I'm sure you can understand that.

While I appreciate your concern, you would do better to get your facts straight before posting nonsense. Thank you for catching the typo in my header though. I hadn't noticed that before. You can rest easy as it's been corrected. Please enjoy the rest of the weekend and have a Happy Mother's Day. 🙂

SortOfConcerned

Hey Rob!
Your supporters actually gave some valuable insight into Elliot and the seizure test – things that I hadn't considered, so I apologize for being hasty. And the 'donate' explanation resonates with me (not that you care, I know) so I thank you for explaining that as well. I do enjoy reading your blog, and I honestly wasn't meaning to troll – just voicing some things that have bugged me (the typo!!) since I started reading you about 6 months ago. I don't have any kids on the spectrum, and I suppose I'm a bit of an emotional tourist when it comes to your blog – but I think many of your readers are. Anyway, sorry to have caused a commotion – hope Lizzie is having a good mother's day. Take care…

Lost_and_Tired

We're all family here, right? No hard feelings and I appreciate last comment 🙂

Dani

Hey Sort of Concerned,
If you don't like it, stop reading. End of story.

Dotdash

Any time you have to preface a comment with "I don't want to sound like a jerk, but" — you should probably stop right there and think about what you are saying and why you are saying it.

I'm surprised that anyone would feel educated enough to diagnose the problems of a family they have never met — and brave enough to assert blithely what another parent should do for the good of his/her family.

Rob's openness about his situation leaves him open to attacks like yours, sadly. I urge you to exercise less "sharp insight" and more compassion. It takes a village, after all. Why don't you be a part of this vlllage rather than the barbarian attacking the gates?

SortOfConcerned

Hey Rob,

I don't want to sound like a jerk, but I sort of agree with 'concerned'. (at least the one comment of his I read, I couldn't find more than one). While it does seem your life is tough I have read your blog A TON, and I take issue with a bunch of things you put out there. #1 – you are really heavy-handed when it comes to asking for money. (ok, when it comes to INFERRING that you could really use a donation). Every other post is about how much your neighborhood sucks and how there are fights and gunshots and you are scared for your safety. We get it – you need money to move. The thing is – it's a bit tiresome to feel constant -weird- pressure to donate to your cause. #2 – I don't think you want to 'get rid of' Gavin. But like It seems like you think you're a lot better at 'setting the stage' than you really are. Many, many of your posts seem like a pretext to having Gavin committed (or fostered, I guess). The third thing that really bothers me is probably biggest issue I have. You say TIME AND TIME again that you have 3 boys on the spectrum, but to my UNTRAINED eye (and yes, I know you'll pounce on that) Elliot is NOT autistic. He doesn't have Asbergers. He's a boy with anxiety because he lives in a completely unstable household. I don't fault you for the instability. I'm sure Gavin and Emmett are a handful – but come on, dude. You are labeling Elliot for a LIFETIME and I honestly believe that if he lived in a more 'normal' household – he would be just fine. Also – enough with the hospitals and the doctors visits. I'm sure Akron and Cleland are more than happy to have your business (and believe me – medicine is BIG BUSINESS) but these EEGS and all of these tests are probably unnecessary. I can see that Emmett is sick – but hooking Elliot up for a 24 hour seizure test? Rob, I am honestly not trying to troll your site. You say that you welcome honest criticism and you have put yourself and your entire family out there for the whole world to see. I'm just telling you that to me – a very educated person, with sharp insights and perspectives, you are very transparent. And I think that some of your family members might be better served if you got off the blog and worked to make their lives a bit more 'normal'. I feel genuinely bad for your situation, but only sometimes. Other times it feels like you create the chaos, only to then turn around and 'survive DESPITE the chaos'. It's sort of a cycle that you create yourself… Ok, sorry for the long rant. I've been wanting to say these things for a really, really long time but the comment by your 'stalker' spurred me. Oh, and trolling isn't the same as 'stalking'.. ONE LAST THING – you might want to change the typo in your site's tagline if you want to be taken more seriously as a writer. Take it from a fellow writer. You are spreading awareness through 'HONESTY' not 'HONESTLY'… peace.

Megan

1) I think that if you are going to preface your comment with a "i don't want to sound like a jerk, but…" you need to seriously stop and think about what you're going to say.
2) I've been reading this blog for quite awhile and never once have I felt the pressure to donate.
3) You said your UNTRAINED eye. Keyword being untrained. You might be highly educated, but unless you are trained in anything Autism, who are you to say anything? and EVEN if you ARE trained in something related to Autism, do you KNOW this family? Have you met them? How on earth can you say Elliot isn't on the spectrum? Unless you have met the child, heard ALL of his medical background, heard this entire family's background (because don't forget, a blog only allows you to see one part of their lives), how are you qualified to say he's not on the spectrum? For that matter, have you even had one child on the spectrum? If not, I ask again. Who are you to judge?

If you don't like what he has to say, then don't read! It's as simple as that.

Julia

If you're going to contest the diagnosis of a child you've never met, you might want to start by spelling the condition right (also a good idea if you're going to nit pick the spelling of others) . Judging whether or not Elliott has a spectrum disorder is only possible by assessing his social reciprocity and other things that contribute to the diagnosis, to be honest with two brothers and a mother on the spectrum, it's more likely that he would have Asperger's than not. Why would he have a diagnosis and attend Summit Academy if he was typically developing? Also, there's a high rate of anxiety amongst children with Asperger's, it's an extremely common comorbidity.

Who are you to judge whether the medical tests are unnecessary? If something was wrong with your child wouldn't you go to any lengths to find out what it was? I've been following Rob's story for almost 2 years now and I've seen the changes in the boys (as a medical professional who specialises in autism). For children with complex medical and psychiatric needs, ruling out something like seizure activity is important. Seizure activity can often look like other conditions ranging from a motor tic disorder to OCD/Anxiety. When it's so straight forward to rule out one of those things through a relatively non-invasive procedure, it's definitely worth it. Do you think it would be better to let a child continue to possibly have minor seizures rather than identify and treat them?
Anyway, I think I've made my point.

Janine

What if the person doesn't know that what they are saying is bothersome. I know if I was the one you are referring to I would want a heads up personally cause I would never want to hurt your or your family's feelings. I hope whoever is doing this will stop. I hope none of my posts were considered to be hurtful. I think you are all awesome and work really, really hard at raising your family. Reading your posts help me at times when I feel all alone with my special daughter and her special issues. Thank you for doing this blog.

Denise

What's wrong with people?!!! So wrong.
My recent post Blessings on Mothers

Dotdash

I'm not sure what you are dealing with with this cyber stalker (are you talking crazy crazy or just thoughtless comments?) On the off chance it's thoughtlessness: as someone who follows your blog and has commented a few times, I would want to be told if my comments were offensive. It's always possible that what we put out there, thinking it is supportive and useful, is just hurtful or evidence we have not walked in someone else's shoes. The vast majority of commenters are, like me, very supportive of you, both as father/husband and as blogger/informer and would hate to be a source of hurt.

Karen Croxon

wow as if you don't have enought shit to deal with in your life 🙁

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