This has been a rough weekend. Gavin is extremely manic. Lizze and I are losing our minds. He is all over the place. He asks the same questions over and over again. The rest of the time he doesn't make any sense.

We were supposed to celebrate my mother's and Gavin's birthday. It got moved from my parents house to my brothers house due to the snow (no where to park). We let Elliott Richard go with my sister but the rest of us stayed back. We knew Gavin wouldn't make it. We can't take any more right now so we stayed home. Gavin has had a rough day and that would have pushed him even farther over the edge. He has to be at school in the morning.

I kinda feel like people don't really understand why things have to be the way they are. It makes it harder to make these types of decisions. Ultimately we do what's best for us directly. I have to trust that everyone understand's it has nothing to do with them. But we lost my wife's adoptive family because they never understood. We have lost almost all our friends because we have to live our lives in a way were everything is black and white.

Gavin only understands black and white. The answer can only ever be yes or no. So there is no wiggle room on anything. Most people can't and/or won't understand. It makes life very lonely for all of us.

Lost and Tired

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