Changes…

Gavin is changing. His mannerisms have completely changed. They way he talks is very mechanical now. His face moved like a bad animatronic machine from an old movie. I don’t know if this a side effect of the new anti-psychotics but it is very concerning. We have an appointment in a few days but we emailed Dr. R today to let him know what was happening.

Listening to Gavin ramble (because that’s what he does now) is like watching an old Kung Fu movie that has been voiced over. It’s all very dramatic. He also bares his teeth when he’s talking, it’s really weird and honestly a bit creepy.

He has become much more aggressive and we are back to having meltdowns several times a day. We almost need to prevent him from having verbal contact with his brothers due to the inappropriate content that comes out of his mouth. I’m reaching my breaking point. I can feel myself starting to crack and there is no end in sight.
No relief around the corner. Each and every day is getting worse then the one before meaning that “every day that I get up is the worst day of my life” (to quote the movie Office Space).

He told us he’s hearing voices and that they are telling him to do things. He won’t tell us what they are saying and that is concerning. The last time this happened we had to keep ER and EJ locked in our room with us for their own safety. The last major psychotic break he had he was drawling pictures of our house burning down with us inside. No one can tell what’s going on with him.

This is our reality and not one that is particularly pleasant. This is just part of our story as unbelievable as it may seem it’s all true.

2 comments

  1. I know things are shitty. I'm not gonna claim that I *know* just HOW shitty but I do know from knowing YOU TWO the way I do. I just commented on Lizze's blog – and I'm going to say the same thing here – he knows he's in charge of the voices and doesn't have to do what they say, to me that's HUGE!! And no matter how fleeting it may shine it is a real example that you and all you guys have done for him IS helping – in some way!

    No matter how crappy it gets (and this is for both of you!!!) always remember that your non-judgement-passing, non-mind screwing friend who is lacking sleep in NW FL is here for you guys 🙂 (or where ever the Navy & my husband take me).

    1. Thanks Nikky.

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