We received a call from Akron Children’s yesterday (apparently while we at the Cleveland Clinic cause we noticed the voicemail last night). The neuro developmental pediatrician wants to meet with us right away. Emmett had an appointment in March but the message said we can’t wait that long. I can’t tell you how this feels. We know it’s bad news…Otherwise they would just tells us everything is ok.
It’s one thing to know your child is Autistic but it’s another thing to “KNOW” your child is Autistic. Unless you’ve experienced something like this first hand you just can’t imagine how it feels. It’s like my entire world is made of glass. The moment those words come out of the doctors mouth everything around me just shatteres to pieces. All I want to do is cry but I can’t because my son will know something is wrong. I get sick to my stomach and it’s all I can do to not throw up. I start shaking as I try to fight back the tears. Despite the doctors reassuring and well intentioned words I know what this means. I have, after all, done this before.
I truly hope that none of you ever to feel this, let alone more then once. I also hope you never take for granted the simple things. You truly don’t know how lucky you are if you never have to experience anything like this.