#Autism: Having the “Talk” with your special needs child

Last night,  while at Wednesday night therapy with the boys,  we had one of the most awkward conversations with Gavin.  Dr.  Pattie wanted to address Gavin’s sexual aggression once again. 

Unfortunately,  that involved the boys have a penis and girls have a vagina talk.

This became necessary after an incident that occurred while Gavin was playing with Elliott during therapy last night.

I have to commend Dr.  Pattie because she did a really good job confronting him on these issues.  In a unfortunate way,  it was good that she witnessed Gavin’s behavior last night because she was able to address it on the spot,  instead of a week later.

It was however,  one of the most awkward conversations I think I have ever had with anyone.  I don’t know who was more uncomfortable,  me or Gavin.

Dr.  Pattie explained about his body changing and new feelings he’s experiencing.  She explained that it’s very normal and ok to feel those feelings but that he was not allowed to touch people on their private parts or let anyone else touch him on his.  She told him what was private and what wasn’t.

She also explained that he can touch himself only in private -bathroom etc- and he is never to talk to his brothers about it.

Gavin got really upset because he was being confronted about his behavior but I think he was also very confused about the topic to begin with.

He claimed that he’s never touched anyone on their privates but we know that’s not true.  If fact,  I caught him doing just that earlier in the day. I don’t know if he really doesn’t remember or it’s more of a selective memory type thing. Regardless of whether he remembers or not,  the behavior is inappropriate and unacceptable.

When we got home from that very uncomfortable visit,  I told Gavin that I was very proud of him for participating in that conversation at Dr.  Pattie’s.

If nothing else comes of last night’s talk,  at least we laid out the ground rules and he knows what is acceptable and what isn’t. Whether or not he actually remembers,  remains to be seen. 

**Thanks for reading**

       -Lost and Tired

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Janine

I wonder if there are any books on the subject. I bet there are books about sexuality and autism. Do you guys have a library handy? I think I came across a book for kids about that specific topic. I wonder if that would help??? ~~hugs~~ to your whole family this must me beyond frustrating.

Lost_and_Tired

Actually his therapist just ordered a book. That will be arriving shortly 🙂

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