Elliott is not dealing with Gavin being gone very well. He has been riding and emotional roller coaster all day and like someone that ate too much before jumping on those ride, I’m about to lose it.
Seriously though, I feel bad for Elliott right now because he is so completely confused.
On one hand, Gavin had him so stressed out that he couldn’t sleep and if he did, they were flying of nightmares.
On the other hand, Elliott is fiercely loyal and loves Gavin to death.
We have been trying everything we can think of of to distract him but nothing seems to work for very long. I’ve even offered to talk about it as much as he needs to.
While Gavin has spent time away from home before, Elliott was much younger and wasn’t affected.
I sure wish there were some magic words that I could whisper in his ear that would make everything better. For now, all I can tell him is that everything will be alright.
Poor little guy 🙁 Maybe he can write him a letter? That might help him feel better.
I've been thinking, perhaps you can arrange a regular "visiting" time for Elliott (and maybe Emmett?) at your parent's place? That way "The E's" know they will be able to see Gavin, it's not like he's disappeared completely. Plus they can plan for it (schedules help a lot with calming anxiety), and you can plan for it, and it can be limited to whatever interactions you want to allow, for a limited amount of time. Such as "We will see Gavin this weekend for 3 hours on Saturday Afternoon. We will all have lunch together, and then you can color together" – you don't have to bring Gavin to you, and you can leave at the designated time, and you can keep it 100% supervised. Maybe this won't work for your situation, obviously I don't live it, so I wouldn't know, but if it is at all possible to do something like this, it might be very worth it in helping to calm Elliott's anxieties, and allowing him to maintain some sort of relationship with his brother.
I can imagine it's terrifying for Elliott to not know anything about Gavin – it might be fear of the unknown… doesn't know when he'll see him again. Doesn't know what he'll do when he sees him. Gavin's a role model (no matter how good or bad), and it's scary to have that taken away without any other concrete information.
Good luck, and I know this has got to be one of the hardest situations you've ever been in.
@E The Third Glance thanks. That's not a bad idea. I think we'll talk to Dr. Patti on Tuesday.