What were we thinking moving Gavin home?

I wanted to keep you all updated on how Gavin has been doing since moving home earlier this week.

For those of you new to my blog, Gavin was moved out of the house about 2 months ago for behavioral reasons, and moved into his Grandparents house.

Gavin had been diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder along with about a dozen other things, all serious. However, at this point in time, the RAD is the most serious of the mental health issues we are dealing with.

Gavin has become very, very volatile.

image

We were experiencing massive, house shaking tantrums upto several times a day. The other boys were terrified and Gavin, having no conscience, simply doesn’t care.

Gavin lacks the capacity to truly feel empathy for anyone and make or maintain healthy relationships. He’s lacking the needed neurological connections for that to be possible. 

Having said that, he’s very well socialized and so he knows the right things to say, but there is a big difference between meaning what you say and just knowing what to say.

As you can imagine, that makes things very challenging.

However, this week Gavin had to return to the hospital for an autonomic crisis, one of his many health problems. His brain does not control his autonomic functions properly and so he has to be very closely monitored.

Gavin had missed several weeks of one of his medications and was not always adhering to the very strict, vitally necessary regime, set forth by the experts at the Cleveland Clinic. This is what eventually led to his recent crisis.  There is very little room for error when it comes to his health and it’s an overwhelmingly daunting task.

After talking with his doctors, Lizze and in decided that he needed to move back home. It’s the only way that we can ensure that everything is done.  We have to know, without a shadow of a doubt, that he has his meds and does not stray from what was set out by his doctors.

The only way we can do this is by having firsthand knowledge of Gavin‘s day to day activities. The only way we can have that knowledge is by moving him home.

Aside from his health and safety, this is extremely important because until he’s medically stable, he can’t enter into residential treatment and get the help that he so desperately needs.

We are so incredibly grateful to Lizze’s parents for allowing him to live with them, and my parents for picking him up from school every day. Without the help of our families, I do think know of we would have made it this far.

At this junction, Gavin has been home for 2 full days.

He’s been doing pretty well and to ensure that he continues to behave, we are implementing a very ridged routine that will help him to make better choices. A huge thanks goes out to his principle at school for helping put this routine together. 

I should also thank wraparound for continuing to help us reach our goal of getting Gavin into residential treatment.

This is a very long and difficult journey and we’ve already been on it for almost 13 years now.

All we can do is our best for Gavin, while ensuring the best interests and safety of his brothers.  If he becomes too dangerous once again, we’ll have to figure something else out.  However, for right now, this is the only option we have. 

Rob Gorski

Full time, work from home single Dad to my 3 amazing boys. Oh...and creator fo this blog. :-)
0 0 votes
Article Rating

Join The Conversation

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

7 Comments
most voted
newest oldest
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Lost and Tired

robinsonfruitbat thank you so much.  That’s a really nice thing to say.. 🙂 Please have a nice day.  🙂

robinsonfruitbat

Hi,

I just wanted to say how much I appreciate the honest and feeling way in which you express how hard things are. There are a lot of people who sell the supposed ‘Joy’ of Autism and although I can see the lighter and amazing side I also live with the day to day challenges of having one child with Autism let alone 3!

Walter Winesberry

Please call me. I would like to know if our Protocol could help Gavin. Maximizeautisticpotential.com

proffy_mommy

Hoping that you’re able to maintain the schedule and stability through the holidays — I know that’s always a tough time when routines get shaken up at our household with school letting out and the hoopla that is Christmas here in our tinytown. I’ll be thinking about you all and sending good vibes your way. All the best!

lostandtired

@proffy_mommy thank you 🙂

Jodi p

@lostandtired
Is there a possibility of moving the Es temporarly to grandparents to help with fear/ anxiety

lostandtired

@Jodi p probably not. Elliott would never leave. Right now, things are going well.