He was home only 15 minutes

Gavin is back home until Friday because he’s still off of school and Lizze’s parents are going back to work.  This is really difficult because as a temporary solution, nothing more permanent is in place yet.  This means that there will be quite a bit if back and forth.

This is a problem because no one can get adjusted to anything before it all gets changed again. 

Right now it’s like a constant state of chaos. 

I misunderstood the schedule and wasn’t expecting Gavin home tonight.  Anyone familiar with a RAD child,  knows that even though you love them with all your heart, you have to mentally prepare for them to come home. 

We were struggling with the 2 boys already tonight and Gavin arrived home.  I asked him to please go get ready for bed.  I had to ask him about 5 times to please stop assembling his Legos and get ready for bed. 

He wanted to show me his comic book that he’s been working on.  I want to see it but not tonight.  I said he could show me in the morning. I was wrapped up in trying to get the kids ready for bed.

Gavin was hounding me for his medication and I told him that he was going to have to wait. 

Next thing I know, he’s back messing with his stuff again. I reminded him that I needed him to get ready for bed. 

At this point he began freaking out over me not having given him his meds yet. 

He’s not even home 15 minutes and he’s already freaking out.  I told him that he was going to have oatmeal for breakfast and he began screaming and hitting himself.  This of course sent Elliott and Emmett running into their room in terror. 

You know, I think I have to keep in mind that Gavin came home tonight to an already charged environment.  Everyone was already stressed out to the max and adding Gavin to that mix is like division into a swimming pool filled with gasoline and then lighting a match. 

I think that in light of the circumstances and as long as Gavin does well in the morning, I will grant him clemency on the oatmeal. 

I’m feeling like he came in at a bad time, not that any time would really be better.

Right now, it’s more important that I keep the peace.  We already know that Gavin simply never learns his lesson so what’s the point.  We need to make it through the next 3 days and that’s probably more important than fruitlessly trying to address behavioral problems.

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Jodi p

How us Gavin with his grandparents
Does he challenge them the same, or cross boundary/ personal space issues with them.
Does he try the one against other with them or have meltdowns within them

lostandtired

@Jodi p Gavin does pretty well at his grandparents house. The reason being that he isn’t challenged or held accountable the way he is at home or would be in residential. However, we decided going into this with her parents, that they would strive to simply keep the peace so that he can remain there as long as possible. It’s not ideal because there are significant inconsistencies but nothing about this whole situation with Gavin in is ideal and it’s a means to an end.

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