THE SAD TRUTH – I just don’t know if school should be a priority anymore

THE SAD TRUTH – I just don’t know if school should be a priority anymore

Today has been a windfall of both the good and not so good. On the good side, Gavin’s first at home IVIG infusion went really well.  Also featured on the good side today was Elliott and Emmett both having really good days at school today. 

That’s about where the good side ends.

The not so good side brought with it report cards.  Emmett did amazing, as did Elliott.  Elliott though, did slip in a a couple subjects and we need to figure out why. 

Gavin on the other hand is tanking.  He’s barely holding on to a D in Math class and his grades have fallen in just about every other subject as well. 


We have to schedule a conference with Gavin’s teachers and at least touch base with the Elliott’s and Emmett’s as well.  While we want to connect with E’s new teachers, Gavin clearly needs a special conference.

At the rate he’s going, I’m concerned about him even graduating and moving onto high school.

This of course has had me contemplating the real world value in continuing to push for his education anymore.  I absolutely believe in education but Gavin is a unique case and for a kid who only last night could figure out how to close the pizza box, we are likely fighting a losing battle. 

With Gavin’s continued decline, I just don’t know if school should be a priority anymore. 

This site is managed almost exclusively from my Samsung Galaxy Note 3. Please forgive any typos as auto-correct HATES me. 😉

Update: If you like this post, check out these as well. Click —–> Here <—– for my Top Posts.

“Like” me on Facebook

Visit the My Autism Help Forums

To reach me via email, please Contact Me

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Notify of

Yes, I would like to receive emails from The Autism Dad. Sign me up!

By submitting this form, you are consenting to receive marketing emails from: Business Name. You can revoke your consent to receive emails at any time by using the SafeUnsubscribe® link, found at the bottom of every email. Emails are serviced by Constant Contact

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

most voted
newest oldest
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Lin Benfield

This is why we homeschool. Our daughter has improved so much educationally since we took her out of public school. We also diminished fears of her safety or abuse. Feel free to ask me about it. Also school socialization is overrated for a girl who has spent 80%+ of her education in a room full of boys. Only 2 girl classmates and not together in 13 years.

Emma Rosser

My son is homeschooled and thriving, school failed him bigtime.

Amanda Larson

My son only does ABA and he is almost a teenager

Maria Hall

It is. It fills the time. It shows the regression. It gives him something to do. Maybe you should homeschool because then it gives all of you something to do together to make memories instead of just biding time until it happens. But play the what if game a sec…. what if they find out why and can make it stop? He would need the learning he would miss if you stopped school. Make every day count!

Ginger Lowery Anton

I had the same thought 14 years ago and took my angel out of school and homeschooled him. Best thing I ever did for my angel .

Janet Meliti

My son Matthew is 11 yrs old he will be 12 in November.

Janet Meliti

I seriously don’t can’t make a big fuss or a priority on certain aspects of schooling anymore. It cannot be the main top priority. I teach him I know what he can do etc and see how well he gets it. He can excell and shines in so many other ways and that’s w hat really counts these days. Him just living being active is a huge plus.

Janet Meliti

Well it’s not been easy as have had to prove that he is smart has the ability to learn regular subjects etc just like typical kids um I ‘ve really have had to really keep advocating for my son on so many levels. Being his voice tracking and showing his progress. I recently got to where I had take back more control over the situation of my son’s education /IEP accomplishments and say to them it doesn’t matter what appeared to you that what he can and cannot do as I and otheres know different and his life is at stake. I ‘ve had to just move on and teach him and let him do alot of hands on with kindle apps and his communication boards. My son is in more kidney failure and issues with his prunebelly syndrome. Quality of life and management of his Autism etc is more important than regiment schooling I teach him etc as he is feeling up to it. His life was on the line critically several times again reccently. Very lucky to have him around still. He has a lot of ups and downs and we don’t know how long he will still be around.

Tracey Green

It is a dilemma. Our son has severe anxiety and becomes mentally unwell with the stress of school. We ask ourselves this question alot as it is heartbreaking to see him suffer. Academically he is advanced so the pressure is on to keep him in school but if things don’t improve we will look at flexi schooling which is half days at school, half days at home or similar combinations. I hope things work out for you. In situations like this, gut instinct is the decider.

Lauren Lown

I wonder that too.. my daughter was just out for 5 weeks, on picc line antibiotics and thinking to my self thats almost a summer plus snow days and than real summer barely went to school…

Charlie Bolton


Lost and Tired

For me it’s like this. When I look at my medically fragile, chronically ill teenager, struggling with school this much, I simply question if we should be focusing more on his quality of life instead of trying to get him to do something he may simply not be able to do.

Jude Leobold

How many schools have a clue what the needs are, or how to meet them?

Tammy Wagar

Depends on your state. I homeschool and we don’t do sit down work. We have fun, we focus on life skills and we don’t worry about academics. My son is 12 and mentally 2…and he’s learned more in the 4 years of homeschooling than he did in 5 yrs of public schooling

Janet Meliti

I really get where your coming from its not easy it’s very tough my thoughts are with you and I support you 100 percent.

Lost and Tired

Janet Meliti how do you know what the right thing to do is?

Janet Meliti

I ask the same question myself for my boy even with me homeschooling him cause of his other fragile medical issues on top of the Autism.

Lost and Tired

Mbrown09Brown  that’s really nice of you to say.  The truth is that while Gavin can have some extreme behavioral problems as a result of his mental health issues, when it comes to his health, he’s just like my wife.  He never ever complains about anything.  
He’s just a little trooper and just does what he’s told when it comes to his health.  Lizze is the same way. 

It’s also a team effort.  I couldn’t do this without Lizze and the help and support of our parents and all of you.  🙂


I agree. Balance for your family what should prevail. Education is important as well as social interaction but these don’t HAVE to come from the school he attends now. You work so hard to keep him healthy, which has to come before he can flourish. So amazing how strong of a person you are


I understand your concerns, but if Gavin can still handle going to school it’s probably good for him to go; it gives him some socialization and a sense of normalcy in an otherwise ‘abnormal’ life.  The other side is that you and Lizze get a much needed break when all the boys are in school.


I think for good or bad, it probably gives him a feeling of normalcy. I’d hold onto that for as long as you could.


It’s about balance….school is important but not THE most important thing in a child’s life. We don’t enforce homework because it leads to the kind of meltdowns that get violent. Not worth it. Find your balance as a family and don’t let anyone make you feel guilty about it!

Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
%d bloggers like this: