Focusing on the positive, even amongst the problems

I’ve been working with Gavin for the past few months on things he would need for independent living.  While the chances of that happening are remote at best, I figure that knowing these skills will increase the odds in his favor.

The two main things I’ve been working on are taking out the trash and laundry. 

He’s been doing pretty well with the trash lately but never remembers unless he’s reminded. However, once reminded he does a pretty darn good job. 

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The biggest success so far is with the laundry. 

I’ve been having him carry clothes down to the basement for awhile now.  That progressed to having him put the laundry into the washer but not actually add the soap and start it. 

That said, today Gavin took the laundry out of the washer and put it into the dryer.  Just as we’ve been practicing, he sets the temp and timer on the dryer and pushes the button to start the load. 

He’s actually almost mastered the dryer.

These are all positive things, as well as skills that he will need in life.

When he came up from the basement after throwing the clothes into the dryer, I gave him a high-five.

Let me say this.  We are always having to correct Gavin and address his problematic behavior. It feels really good when I can pat him on the  act and tell him he’s done a really good job.

Keep up the good work Gavin…..

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  • Great skills to teach your son. Kudos to you and Gavin to working together as a team to get the laundry done.

  • steveborgman says:

    Rob, I’ve been thinking of exactly the same topic with my 14 year old son. Those independent living skills are so crucial for any adolescent. One of the things I’m working on is noticing all the things I do on my own around the house, writing those down, and I’m going to start delegating and teaching those to my kids. This includes mowing the lawn, which I started teaching him over the last couple summers. It takes effort and discipline as a parent, but the alternative is depriving my kids of the opportunity to develop skills and character.

  • Val Cross says:

    My NT kid has to be told every time to take out the trash, that’s a teenager thing, too!

  • Becky Wiren says:

    This is great! It’s so easy to get buried in the negative, the bad stuff. Glad Gavin is learning so well. Hooray!