We are still trying to figure out what we are going to have to do with Gavin. The timing of everything is really bad. Not that any other time would be good, really, just better then this. Part of our strategy is to keep him as stimulation free as possible… That is key for him to stay afloat. That means making tough decisions, like avoiding gatherings for example. I don’t know how to decide these things anymore. I don’t want to be making a decision out of frustration and strip him of something he might otherwise enjoy. It’s really easy to get caught up in that type of thing when dealing with what we are dealing with.. However the reality is that he will probably not do well. Is it even fair of us to put him in that type of situation? What about the other kids? They pay a very high price for Gavin’s behaviors…I don’t feel like explaining to everyone why Gavin has bruises and scratches on his face and extremities… I hate having to explain it to Elliott and Gavin’s teachers… His teachers seem to think he walks on water and it’s tough to get the reality of this situations across to them. Poor Elliott is so confused by Gavin’s behaviors not to mention frightened…..
I know we will probably all go tomorrow to see family and at some point Gavin will lose his temper. These are things that we know to be an “absolute” when it comes to Gavin. Nothing about this is easy and I just can’t seem to relax. I can’t seem to enjoy the holiday’s anymore. I try to as best I can for the sake of the 2 youngest but it’s getting more and more difficult as Gavin’s behaviors become more and more extreme and dangerous.
Honestly Rob I have no courage. It's just doing the right thing. I wish I had answers for the both of us but I just try and put my faith in God. He's been faithful and Sandi, my wife, is still alive so I'm truly blessed to just have her. By the way, the new rom is excellent but you gotta stop releasing them haha. I get used to one and you top it. know that your entire family are bathed in prayer and always…… ROLL TIDE!
Thanks David. Honestly, what you are going through is my worst fear right now with my wife. She has so many complications and everything seems to be getting worse. I truly admire your courage… Thanks for everything…
FYI I posted a new ROM if you are interested…
Brother you ans your family are in my prayers. I too have struggled with the holidays as my wife has no interest in life, much less the holidays. I feel guilty for wanting to celebrate and be with friends and family so I've just kinda shut down and gone into function/holiday mode. I don't mean to imply my situation even comes close to yours but I may have an inkling of how you feel. Above all God still loves us and provides. If I can ever be of help to you please feel free to email me.
Once again you speak with a wisdom beyond your years. Thank you for always knowing what to say. Maybe someday I can return the favor. Please have a great holiday and wish your family a very merry Christmas…..
Isolating him from the family sure does make you feel guilty…but they aren't the ones who have to deal with it ,you and Liz are.I feel that guilt also and its gotten to the point that we just don't get invited anymore.I don't think that their is an answer that really works….you seem to loose either way.You sometimes got to think of yourself,as hard as that is at times, and do whats best for all of you guys.Hope you guys are able to get some enjoyment somewhere.