It’s been a productive morning so far. Emmett got to school on time and is dealing with state testing today. He’s not excited about these tests, even though he always does well. It’s just added stress that I feel autistic kids really don’t need. That’s a whole other topic for a different day.
I went walking this morning and then crammed in a decent workout before coming home and getting some work done.
There are several projects that I’m waist deep in right now and it’s a little overwhelming. At the same time, it’s also exciting because I need the work and it means I’m doing something right. It’s a little scary at times but it’s a good problem to have. I’m working on organization and efficiency right now because that will make life easier and help limit some of the growing pains.
I feel pretty good right and I’m making it a point to take better care of myself. I’ve been to the gym every day this week and it feels good to be able to say that. I do feel a good bit of stress but who doesn’t have that in their lives right now. My stress is unrelated to the people in my life but rather anxiety and unrealistic expectations I tend to place upon myself.
The reality is that things, while not perfect, are going so much better than they ever have been in the past. I’m genuinely happy and the kids are doing quite well. I’m blessed with truly amazing people in my life. My God, Elliott’s even successfully moved into a huge mainstream high school and is doing great so far. He’s making friends and developing a social life of his own. Proud dad moment. ☺
I think a large part of my problem is that I seem to function better in crisis situations. I can handle an emergency like a boss but stumble when everything is going well. It’s super weird and I was just having this conversation yesterday. I’m working on it though. We’ll just add it to the list of personal growth goals I’m working towards.
Something else you may have noticed is that I’m writing more. I’m actually quite proud of that because it’s taking some effort but I need to keep building and it really is therapeutic for me. It’s weird, I know. While it’s important to me, it can never replace the people in my life. Knowing that I can talk to them about anything, is such a comfort. I’m not always good at it but I never foget they’re there for me and I love them dearly.
I’m looking forward to sharing some of the projects I’m working on because some of them are taking me a bit outside my comfort zone.
It’s back to the grind and I hope you all have a fantastic day.