How are you supposed to cope with any of this stuff. As a parent I feel like a complete failure, like I missed something. How does this even happen. I have so many questions. Has Emmett John ever heard my voice? Did we do something wrong? I'm trying to remain focused on helping him but I feel helpless. I can't imagine going through life not being able to hear. We have been learning sign language the past few weeks and Lizze is really all over it.  We are going to get Emmett John in therapy so he can learn sign language also and have a way to communicate with us. Please keep him in your prayers.Lost and Tired

Emmett John and Gavin both have their appts right now. We split up and I took Gavin while she took Emmett John to the audiologist to find out more about his hearing problems. Sitting here I just realized Gavin is due for a few shots. This is a very difficult task to complete. It goes something like this. "In this corner weighing in at 75lbs and not wanting shots is Gavin. And in this corner we have 1 doctor,5 nurses and dad collectively weighing in at close to 3/4 tons". While a little dramatic that's actually how it goes. It usually takes 5 people to administer his shots because he is fighting so hard. The nurse just left and it looks like he is only getting the getting the flu…

Last night Gavin had a 45min meltdown.  It was very similar to the ones we were having 8 monthes ago. I let him go because I didn't want to give him any attention and reward his behavior.  I reminded him of the rules. Stay away from the windows. He can only scream into his pillow and stop his feet on his mattress. He finally gave up and finished reading and then went to bed. I really wish we didn't have to go through all of that just to get him to do his work.He woke up this morning in a "wonderful" mood. Today should be interesting to say the least.While this may seem like alot already, my thoughts are on Emmett John.  We will find out today if he can…

No sooner did Lizze leave with my parents for a meeting with Patti when Gavin completely lost it.  He is upstairs screeming for 30 mins now because he couldn't manipulate me into allowing him to go to bed instead of finishing his reading. He has gotten used to these meltdowns getting him out of things at school. Well guess what. That's not going to work here and the problem will be corrected at school. We usually pick our battles but this one I think is worth fighting.  He has to learn that he cannot resort to violence when he doesn't get his way. This is insane. The entire house is shaking.  I put on Monsters Inc for the kids and that drowns out the screaming.  This is the dark side autism. Violent…

As I predicted last night, this morning was loads of fun. I think we 3 meltdowns this morning. I am hoping he has a decent day at school because I think his teachers are starting to catch on. This is when we are going to be having trouble because he can no longer manipulate his way through the day. Now he is being held accountable for his disruptions and behavioral issues. This is great news because he needs things to be as consistant as possible. We will have to see what transpires at 3pm today...Rob

Gavin appears to be cycling again. Just check on him and he was dancing and singing in the dark in his room.. I predict an interesting day tomorrow.. Rob Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®

They say God never gives you more then you can handle. I think God is over estimating our abilities just a bit. We are already drowning with Gavin. Now it appears that Emmett John is profoundly deaf. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hearing_impairment This means that he only hears certain frequencies. He is scheduled for the audiologist on Wednesday. He is also going to the children's hospital for a hearing test where they sedate him and administer sounds and then measure brain waves to see if he even processes sound. He is also going to go through the autism clinic because he still cannot talk and the family history (though no one thinks he is autistic). We have been teaching Emmett and ourselves sign language because he has no other way to communicate with us.…

As I stated prior Gavin turns 10 in the morning. This morning started with a "tummy ache". This is a difficult situation to manage because Gavin tends to have "stomach aches" when he doesn't get his way. He has learned to use them as a manipulation tool to get something he wants or get out of something he doesn't want to do. It is sometimes hard to tell the difference between sick and manipulation. Today his tummy "conveniently" hurt. It seem to come and go depending on the situation. We made him stay in bed for a good part of the day for two reasons. We wanted him to learn a lesson if he was faking and get some rest if he wasn't. He said he was going to "puke"…