So today is jeans day at Gavin's school. Gavin doesn't like jean so we got permission for him to wear his tan cargo pants. Gavin came down this morning in some camouflage pants. He can't wear those because the bother some of the other kids (it's a pattern thing). All I did was explain that to him and he exploded. it was so bad that Elliott Richard wet himself and the dog wet the floor. He also broke a stair tread on his way upstairs. I went up after him to calm him down which was a waste of time and precious energy. I showed him the pants he was allowed to wear. I also told him if he didn't control himself that he would wear his regular school pants…

On the Emmett John front we made some progress. He has finally begun using some of the signs we are teaching him. He signed "daddy" last night. It was amazing!!! We won't get into the children's hospital until March. His ped. Is working to get him in quicker. Lost and Tired Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®

I am laying next to Emmett John singing to him and he keeps digging at his ears.  Then he takes my finger and puts it in his ear.  It was like he was say "daddy please fix my ears". I cried...

Gavin had a pretty good morning all things considered. Lizze and I are trying to keep it together in light of all we have going on. We keep wondering what happened. He passed his hearing test when he was born. What happened between now and then to cause his hearing loss? There are 2 likely possibilities as to what happened. The first one is that the first test was wrong when he was born. The second is the constant ear infections. All we know for sure is his tube are not blocked and he doesn't have an ear infection now. If the next test comes back and confirms the first test then we will know the extent. I really think this is just one of those things that happen and…

How are you supposed to cope with any of this stuff. As a parent I feel like a complete failure, like I missed something. How does this even happen. I have so many questions. Has Emmett John ever heard my voice? Did we do something wrong? I'm trying to remain focused on helping him but I feel helpless. I can't imagine going through life not being able to hear. We have been learning sign language the past few weeks and Lizze is really all over it.  We are going to get Emmett John in therapy so he can learn sign language also and have a way to communicate with us. Please keep him in your prayers.Lost and Tired

Emmett John and Gavin both have their appts right now. We split up and I took Gavin while she took Emmett John to the audiologist to find out more about his hearing problems. Sitting here I just realized Gavin is due for a few shots. This is a very difficult task to complete. It goes something like this. "In this corner weighing in at 75lbs and not wanting shots is Gavin. And in this corner we have 1 doctor,5 nurses and dad collectively weighing in at close to 3/4 tons". While a little dramatic that's actually how it goes. It usually takes 5 people to administer his shots because he is fighting so hard. The nurse just left and it looks like he is only getting the getting the flu…

Last night Gavin had a 45min meltdown.  It was very similar to the ones we were having 8 monthes ago. I let him go because I didn't want to give him any attention and reward his behavior.  I reminded him of the rules. Stay away from the windows. He can only scream into his pillow and stop his feet on his mattress. He finally gave up and finished reading and then went to bed. I really wish we didn't have to go through all of that just to get him to do his work.He woke up this morning in a "wonderful" mood. Today should be interesting to say the least.While this may seem like alot already, my thoughts are on Emmett John.  We will find out today if he can…

No sooner did Lizze leave with my parents for a meeting with Patti when Gavin completely lost it.  He is upstairs screeming for 30 mins now because he couldn't manipulate me into allowing him to go to bed instead of finishing his reading. He has gotten used to these meltdowns getting him out of things at school. Well guess what. That's not going to work here and the problem will be corrected at school. We usually pick our battles but this one I think is worth fighting.  He has to learn that he cannot resort to violence when he doesn't get his way. This is insane. The entire house is shaking.  I put on Monsters Inc for the kids and that drowns out the screaming.  This is the dark side autism. Violent…