There's a great deal of stress being felt by Lizze and I but I don't think it's any one thing in particular. The overall amount of shit going on in general is likely the biggest contributing factor. We're pretty much ready for Christmas in regards to shopping but there's way more to Christmas then shopping. Based on how out of control the boys are right now, I can only see things getting worse as we draw closer and closer to the big day. In my last post, I mentioned how the boys were getting along pretty well but that apparently has run its course. Now they're fighting like brothers again and it's upping the level of tension in this house.

I'm officially on day four of withdrawaling from Paxil and so far, so good. I've been slowly tapering down by rotating between my regular dose and half of my regular dose. As of now, I'm not having any problems but honestly, I'm not noticing anything because it will take about four and a half to five days for my levels to begin to drop. It's not going to be anything drastic but it will slowly begin lowering in time and my brain will begin adjusting to not having as much Paxil in my system. I'm still feeling extremely positive about this decision and every day is a step in the right direction.

The boys have been super hyper today and it's only going to get worse as we get closer to Christmas. I've been feeling very much under the weather for most of the day. The large amount of antibiotics I'm on for my back have been upsetting my stomach. I'm making sure that I take them on a full stomach or at least close to it. The problem is that the nausea isn't helping and I have to take these four times a day. The good news is that they're doing their job. My back is slowly healing and definitely isn't getting any worse. Lizze is continuing to take excellent care of the slowly shrinking hole in the middle of my back. After the kids got home from school today, I…

This afternoon, the boys have their annual Christmas Program at school. They're both pretty excited for us to see their performance and we're excited to see it. In fact, Gavin plans on recording the whole thing with his tablet because, and his exact words were, I want to record as many memories as I can. That's pretty awesome but it's also heartbreaking as well because he wants to record them because he knows he's going to forget. 😔 More power to him though. After the program, the boys will be dismissed early and we'll officially begin Christmas break. Lizze and I are as ready for Christmas break as we're going to be. ☺

For the third night in a row, I've been unable to sleep because I haven't been able to get comfortable enough to relax. This absolutely sucks and I can't wait for my back to heal up. No matter what I do or how I'm laying down, my back is driving me nuts. I'm exhausted but between the tape on my back, the allergic reaction I'm experiencimg due to said tape, and the hole in my back, I hurt and itch. This totally sucks..