I’m more than the sum of my flaws

I’m sitting here today sorta going through the highlights of my last 43 years of life. I’m going to be very honest and say that my life feels like it’s been a mixed bag, but I think that’s how life is realistically supposed to be. There are highs and lows throughout this journey, and our job is to ride the waves. I feel like I’ve done that for the most part.

So much has happened during my 42nd year and it’s helped mold me into the man I currently am. I want to look back on some of the changes that have occurred in my life and remember the what those experiences have taught me. I’d even like to glance forward and see what 43 will have to offer.

There have been so many life altering changes in my life over the last 365 days. COVID has been a nightmare that impacts every single human on this planet and has created many complications in my life. We spent a total of 15 months on lockdown and were finally able to re-emerge eariler this year. Coming out of something like COVID lockdown was almost harder than being on lockdown in the first place because it was such a dramatic change, but we did it, and we’re thriving. We’re also fully vaccinated, and taking life by the horns, as safely as we can.

Throughout COVID lockdown, I learned that I was taking many things for granted without even realizing it. That’s a powerful lesson and one that I fully intend to never have to learn again. After spending so much time away from family and friends, I was reminded just how important they all are to me and I will never take them for granted again.

Let’s see. What else?

Oh, I officially became a single Dad and was able to successfully close the previous chapter of my life. That was incredibly important because as I begin writing the newest chapter, I needed to completely close the old one first. I have learned to love myself and I’m happier than I can ever remember being. More importantly, the boys are thriving. I can’t tell you how good it feels to see my kids doing so well. It took some time to find that path forward but we have done so and it’s awesome.

I have learned so much about myself during year 42 of my life and the lessons are helping me to ensure that 43 is my best year yet.

It’s hard to go through significant life changes without experiencing some personal growth, and I’m not an exception to that rule. I have discovered so much about myself that I had either forgotten about, or didn’t even know was there. Every day I’m feeling more and more like my old self and it feels amazing.

I fully recognize that I deserve to be happy. I’ve learned that I’m worthy of love and acceptance as well. I have truly amazing people in my life who show me every single day that I’m more than the sum of all my flaws. I feel so incredibly lucky to have the most amazing kids, girlfriend, family, and friends in the world. I’m far from perfect but they all accept me for me and bring so much light and meaning into my life. I’m truly a better person for knowing them.

I’m looking forward to experiencing continued growth in my 43rd year. I want to give my loved ones the best version of me possible because they deserve nothing less. I’m making major milestones on my weightloss and wellness journey. I’ve lost almost 80 lbs in the last two years and I’m so proud of myself. It feels so incredibly amazing to be comfortable in my own skin. I have become better friends with my reflection and truly love who I am.

All of these things have such a positive impact on my life as a whole.

I’m making plans for the future and working towards that end. I want to get more hiking experience under my belt and go on some crazy adventures. Getting myself back into shape plays a big role in some of my future plans, and so far, this gs are going amazingly well.

On the business front, I have gained some perspective and recognize the need for potential change. I’m not exactly certain what that change is but I’m working on it. I’ve talked about this over the years and if you’re in a similar situation, you might be able to relate. There are complications that go along with being a special needs parent that have required me to walk a very fine line but I’m looking at ways to improve things overall and I’m open to new possibilities.

I love my life and I’m so grateful to be alive. I’ve gained so much perspective, insight, and experience over the last year. I’m so grateful for all I have and I look forward to building a future that leads to continued health, happiness, and prosperity. I feel like I’m finally on the right path and I’m ready to see where it leads.

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BJW

Happy birthday Rob! The good news is that you should have many, many years left to enjoy. From my perspective (62) 43 is young and hopefully, you have enough energy and ideas to keep going. You’ve made a lot of good things happen with being an autism dad, and I’m sure you’ll continue to help others.

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