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I swear to God it just never ends

Today is definitely not going as planned. I was supposed to take Emmett to school, hit the gym, and then bury myself in post production until it was time for another interview after lunch. Unfortunately, it didn't end up that way and instead, I'm at Aultman North waiting on xrays of Emmett's wrist. It just never ends. This is the 3rd time this year that he's needed xrays. He got hurt at recess again, a few days ago. He fell, hurting his right wrist and the pain is getting worse. I don't think it's broken but I do think he sprained it. I also know that I could be wrong. When he first hurt it, I told him that if he doesn't feel better in a couple days, we'll get…

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It’s been a rough week on multiple levels

So, it's been a challenging week for me on a number of levels. I'm emotionally drained from everything going on with my kids. We've also had quite a few appointments this week and I had a number of meetings crammed in between. Physical therapy for Emmett was the last appointment of the week. The kids are with their mom for the weekend and I'm sitting in bed writing this before I call it a night. I have zero plans for this weekend but that's okay. The down time will probably do me some good. I'm not going to work on the house, even though I should. I'm going to sleep in and probably spend all day in my pajamas. After the kids left, I spent the afternoon writing ad copies.…

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What have we come to when kids encourage other kids to kill themselves?

I wish I could go into the details of just how absolutely overloaded I am right now or what I'm feeling. I'm trying to wind down but it's not working very well. I'm trying hard to find a balance here that allows me to share what I think is important without crossing a line. The problem is that I can't really see the line anymore and there a part of me that literally has zero shits left to give. At the moment, I'm dealing with a child who's being bullied and its escalated to social media. It's reached a level where he's fucking being told to kill himself. I'm so over kids being assholes and it's taking everything thing I have not to make some very bad decisions right now.…

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It doesn’t have to be perfect

I've totally been dragging today. I didn't really accomplish anything and I'm okay with that. We're going to call it a mental health day. Elliott's been having a rough time and I've been up with him the last couple of nights. I definitely have a nap calling my name after I get some work done. I'm waiting on more paint before finishing the living room and I'm looking at Saturday before I can get started again. Aside from the first floor being torn apart, it's given me extra time to get caught up at work. The podcast production side of things is getting busy, and is time consuming. I've learned so much since starting this new venture and I've been able to connect with so many amazing people. I've got…

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This is going over better than I thought

Work has been picking up quite a bit this year and it's keeping me busy. I feel good about the direction things are going in. At the same time, I'm still actively looking for other options, at least on a part time basis. As much as I love what I do, I'm finally in a place where I can persue work outside of the home. I'm not going to die on this hill of self-employment if it's not going to afford me the resources I need to better plan for the future. For the moment, I'm embracing the positive changes but still looking for better opportunities. Anyway, I'm in a fantastic mood this morning. Both kids are at school, the house is quiet, and I'm mostly dug out from the…

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I have no right to complain but sometimes I wish life was a little easier

Sometimes I wish life was easier. I totally get that so many people out there have it worse, but sometimes my life is a lot for me to try an manage. I'm grateful for everything I have and while it's far from perfect, it's my life, and I love it. That doesn't mean I don't wish things could be a bit easier from time to time. This week has been challenging for a few reasons and while I've weathered it for the most part, it's taken me down a few notches. I'm tired and overwhelmed. At the same time, I've also been productive and slightly more focused. I still haven't spoken with my doctor about my ADHD concerns, and I'm not sure why. I've spoken privately with some of you…

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My son’s school is shutdown today and you’ll never guess why

Elliott got off to school without a hitch. Emmett is still sleeping because his school is closed because there's not enough people to staff the building, as everyone is out with COVID. I have so many feelings about this. One of the more overwhelming feelings has to do with teachers not being vaccinated. I just don't understand how we are allowing that to happen. It puts everyone at risk and we're barely able to keep the schools open right now as it is. I would have to guess that Emmett most likely won't have school tomorrow either. Elliott doesn't have school on Friday for some reason and all this educational inconsistency is destabilizing, especially for kids in the spectrum. I wish I had a bit more energy this morning but…

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When are we going to learn?

It's been a difficult couple of days for me and that's okay. Life isn't supposed to be easy, right? I'm really tired but having a terrible time falling asleep at night. There are things in my life that I'm worried about and again, that's okay. I feel like despite some of these challenges, I'm still incredibly lucky to be where I am, and I don't want to lose sight of that. The boys didn't go see their mom this weekend and that meant no break for me. Everyone is being extra cautious as a result of COVID, and if someone in either household isn't feeling right, we tend to pull the plug. Their mom was under the weather so the visit was canceled. The kids were bummed out but they'd…

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