I feel pulled is so many different directions because each one of my kids is pulling me in the direction they need me to go in. Unfortunately, none of the boys are ever really going to the same place at the same time and so I can’t seem to be able to kill two birds with one stone, so to speak.
It’s interesting because while I was a single parent, I was completely overwhelmed on most days. Now that I’m no longer a single parent, I’m still absolutely overwhelmed, even with the added help.
I don’t think there’s anything that can truly address that feeling of being overwhelmed because it’s just part of being an Autism parent.
Perhaps there’s slightly different degrees of being overwhelmed but let’s be honest, being even a little overwhelmed, is by definition, more than one can handle. It’s kinda fucked up how that works out but it is what it is.
Having said that, there is something to be said about being overwhelmed alone vs being overwhelmed with someone next to you.
On an interesting side note……
I’ve been hiding out in Minecraft when things get really bad. I had received a Gear VR a few months ago and so I can play Minecraft in virtual reality and it’s pretty incredible.
In a weird way, it’s like being transported into a world that I have complete control over, at least until the kids join and add their personal touches to my happy place. Lol
Anyway, life can really suck sometimes and no amount of positive thinking is going to make it better.
You have to find a way to just power through it. It’s not easy but life isn’t supposed to be easy and the powers that be went to great lengths to ensure that special needs parents never have to deal with easy anything.
I mean, who really wants their kids to wear clothes anyway? Who doesn’t just live for making 15 different meals for dinner, with the hopes that one of them is sensory friendly? I know my day wouldn’t be complete without hearing the exact same story about the exact same goddamn tablet game, 6,000 times. Let’s be honest here, it’s not like we need sleep anyway, right?
If you can relate to this in any way, you’re welcome to join my Minecraft realm.. You can build yourself a house and even blow shit up if that’s makes you feel better. All I need is your Xbox live gamer tag (they’re free, you just need to sign up for one) and I can invite you to join. It doesn’t even matter what you’re playing Minecraft on..
It’s just nice to actually feel in control of things for once.
Anyway, the point is that when things get this bad for me, I have to find an outlet that allows me to decompress and even escape my life for a little while. This is just one way that I can do just that.