One of the things that I can personally struggle with in regards to Autism parenting and parenting in general for that matter, is self-doubt. If there is ever going to be anything that makes an adult question themselves, it’s parenting.
When it comes to Autism parenting, that sense of self-doubt significantly increases and for good reason.
Autism Parenting is tough and there’s no two ways about it.
Speaking for myself but hoping you can relate. I’m harder on myself than anyone else in the world ever could be.
It’s so easy to tear myself down over what I feel are weaknesses or inadequacies on my part. I find that more often than not, I catch myself comparing my parenting abilities to that of the typical parents I’m surrounded by all the time.
They seem to have it all together and often times don’t struggle in the more extreme ways that I do.
I know how tough it is to keep groceries in our house or how overwhelming it is to keep said house reasonably maintained. I know how guilty I can feel when my kids are driving me crazy because I should have more patience with them.
Worst of all, I have to watch my kids struggle in ways that I can’t always have an impact on, especially when it comes to Gavin. This poor kid has already lived through more than most people will during the course of their entire lives. It’s not fair and I can’t do a goddamn thing about it.
I could go on but I think you get the point.
When I see, feel or experience any of these things, I feel like a failure. I feel like I’ve failed and I’m continuing to fail my family. It certainly doesn’t help when people make judgmental comments without first walking in my shoes.
Here’s the thing and this is what I’m hoping you take away from this.
Whenever I compare my situation to someone else’s, I’m always going to lose. As human beings, we tend to compare our weaknesses to everyone else’s strengths and that just never works.
It’s not easy to see this and I constantly have to remind myself that I’m doing the best I can in what is truthfully, a very, very difficult situation.