Read more about the article Quick Update
My thoughts / Quick Update

Quick Update

Just a quick piece of house keeping. As some of you know, I created a reddit sub for autism parenting many years ago. It was a support group for parents to share their experiences and learn from each other. The goal was for parents and autistic adults to come together and learn from each other. I'm not a huge fan of the reddit platform and I moved the group to Facebook (link below). Those who stayed behind requested that the reddit group remain open. I've turned it over to a 3rd party and they will run it as they see fit. Effective immediately, I've severed all ties, deleted my account, and I'm no longer associated in any way, shape, or form, with this group, or any other group on reddit.…

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December 26, 2022
Read more about the article Am I the only parent who struggled with this?
Gavin / Independent Living / My thoughts

Am I the only parent who struggled with this?

I’ve been meaning to talk about this for a while because I think we should be open and honest about this. Here we go. I’ve been very focused on Gavin transitioning into adulthood. He’s almost 23 years old, and this has been a long time coming. It’s also been met with several delays, mainly due to COVID. Anyway, one of the things I struggled with was admitting that Gavin moving out was in everyone’s best interests. It’s in Gavin’s best interest, but it’s best for the rest of us as well. This is where I’ve struggled emotionally with this whole thing. Gavin is among the most amazing humans I’ve ever known, but he’s not always easy to coexist with. His behaviors can be overwhelming and very frustrating for me as…

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December 18, 2022
Read more about the article The Journey to Independence: Progress does not require perfection
Gavin / My thoughts

The Journey to Independence: Progress does not require perfection

If you’ve been following our journey, you know that Gavin has come such a long way. He’s doing so well compared to where he was. However, I think it’s important also to state that improvement doesn’t mean perfection. There are still struggles, and they can be challenging to manage. Today was one of those days where I’m reminded of this. Gavin told me he was going to shave this afternoon. It’s hugely positive that he sometimes recognizes and prompts himself to do this without reminders. I’m proud of this little victory, and I told him that. He ate lunch and then went to the bathroom to shave. Gavin shaves with an electric/rechargeable razor. He gets about 80% of the job done independently but still needs help to get what he…

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December 15, 2022
Read more about the article Helping My Kids Transition to Adulthood is Challenging
Gavin / My thoughts

Helping My Kids Transition to Adulthood is Challenging

Making the switch from parenting young kids with autism to teens and adults can be challenging. Kids grow up so fast, and their needs change as they get older. The teen and young adult years are particularly tough because the push toward independence kicks into high gear. There are so many overlapping behaviors, and I'm learning that some teen stuff is normal. Autism and ADHD will always play a role, but at the end of the day, they're still teenage boys, and they're going to be going through adolescent boy stuff. My current focus is on helping Gavin to move out of the house and move on with his life. We (my incredibly supportive gf and I) have had several meetings with the Department of DD already, and Gavin has…

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December 15, 2022
Read more about the article Every victory matters
Gavin / Little Victories / My thoughts

Every victory matters

It has been a little while since I've shared a victory. Okay, I know. It's been a lot longer than a little while, but better late than never. Today's victory goes to Gavin, and honestly, he blew my mind with this one. Gavin has always been heavily influenced by those around him, especially his younger brothers. He picked up Emmett's habit of constantly asking me if I was okay. I know he means well, but it's compulsive, and it's not uncommon for him to ask me a dozen times a day. It gets annoying sometimes because the repetition wears thin, and I'm hearing it from him and Emmett. I try to be patient, but sometimes it's tougher than others. Anyway, Gavin walked into the living room today and, like clockwork,…

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December 13, 2022
Read more about the article This was once my worst fear
My thoughts

This was once my worst fear

It’s hard to believe that we’ve been dealing with COVID for almost 3 years now. So much has changed during this time. COVID has become a part of everyday life that it’s even been incorporated into our favorite TV shows as well. I’m still not used to that one. LOL If you’ve been reading for a while, you know how hard I worked to shield the boys and I from the pandemic. Gavin is immunocompromised, Elliott has asthma, and even though Emmett and I don’t have anything that really puts us at greater risk, we still didn’t want it. Elliott ended up testing positive earlier this year and that was our first bout with COVID in our house. Everyone else managed to avoid it at the time. Fast forward to…

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December 10, 2022
Read more about the article Finding Myself Again
My thoughts

Finding Myself Again

I’ve been struggling to find myself. There have been so many changes in my life over the last few years and some of them significant. Some of these changes left me feeling lost and broken. I needed to rediscover who I am, and I’ve been on this journey trying too figure it all out. Our identities can become wrapped up in the people and things we hold most dear. For me, I was a son, a fire fighter/paramedic, a husband, a special needs dad, a caregiver, a writer, amongst other things. Sometimes life throws us curveballs and can result in major life altering changes taking place. It doesn’t matter if we welcomed those change or if they were thrust upon us. When we experience loss, significant change, or get too…

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December 9, 2022
Read more about the article My Autistic Son Voted for the First Time: Here’s My Takeaway
My thoughts / Parenting Resources

My Autistic Son Voted for the First Time: Here’s My Takeaway

Last week, my 22-year-old autistic son voted for the very first time. It was a momentous occasion for him. Seeing him exercise his right to vote was an emotional experience, and it got me thinking about what we can learn from his voting journey. Here are a few takeaways that I wanted to share. I also sat down with Gavin, and we talked about his experience on a recent podcast episode. You can also read my previous post about tips to help our kids vote by clicking here. The Importance of Accessibility One of the biggest barriers to voting for people with disabilities is accessibility. What many of us fail to realize is that accessibility to voting starts at home. It's so important that we, as parents, talk to our…

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November 6, 2022