How I’m dealing with my son’s bully

It’s important to note that perception is a huge factor here. We’re not dealing with typical kids, so who knows that’s truly behind this or what the intentions are. All I know for sure is that Elliott is very upset and it’s impacting him both at home and at school.

Frankly, that’s all I really care about. If we can work through this and resolve the underlying issues, great. If not, this kid needs put in his fucking place. By that, I mean the school needs to deal with him as a bully and put this whole thing to bed.

I’ve had countless comments over the last few days and I’m way behind on them. Having said that, people are wondering why I’m not waging war against the school or why I’m not raging mad.

Here’s the thing.

There’s a right way and a wrong way to handle this.  I’ve been around the block a few times and I get that there may be more going on with this kid. I also under that Elliott’s perception isn’t always accurate.

My priority is protecting my son but at the same time, we need to better understand what’s going on in order to resolve it.

If for some reason, things don’t move forward in an appropriate way, I’ll simply keep Elliott home in order to keep him from having to deal with this shit.

At this point, cooler heads will prevail and the school and I are on the same page.

I’m trying to deal with this, while at the same time setting a good example for my kids. Nothing about bullying is easy, but like I said, there’s a right way and a wrong way to handle this.  I hope I’m going about this the right way.

Rob Gorski

Full time, work from home single Dad to my 3 amazing boys. Oh...and creator fo this blog. :-)
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Suzanne Olsen

I think that the best option is for you guys to back Elliot and if you actually see what is happening between the bully and your son, you might be able to get the bully in more trouble.
I think that the bully should be expelled from the school. If not then as i suggested home school both your sons. They might find it easier

Marc Tomor

I hate bullies….. If my son wasn’t on the spectrum,I’d tell him the same thing I told my daughter….. Don’t start it,but if it comes down to it, finish it….I got your back. Forth grade,some boy twice her size kept pushing her down on the playground….My wife gets a phone call around noon and goes down to the school to find ole fat boy with an ice pack on his nose… God I wish I would’ve been able to make that one lmao…..Guess what?…No more BS from him anymore……

My take on this…. You are enabling your son, with the correct tools, to face life! And yes sometimes , some of our kids need extra support, you are not just responding off the cuff, or burning bridges in anger.
I think that is awesome!!!! Over the years, for us, there have been repeated issues with bussing ( not a bullying issue) and in the past a different school issue. And I have other kids still at the one school — so for their sake and mine- no bridges could be burned. However– I did manage to make myself the kind and gracious squeaky wheel!!!
I appreciate hearing where you are coming from. Knowing what you all face daily…. Mad respect.
Fellow autism, ptsd, and more family 🙂

Suzanne Olsen

I think that the best option is for you guys to back Elliot and if you actually see what is happening between the bully and your son, you might be able to get the bully in more trouble.
I think that the bully should be expelled from the school. If not then as i suggested home school both your sons. They might find it easier

Marc Tomor

I hate bullies….. If my son wasn’t on the spectrum,I’d tell him the same thing I told my daughter….. Don’t start it,but if it comes down to it, finish it….I got your back. Forth grade,some boy twice her size kept pushing her down on the playground….My wife gets a phone call around noon and goes down to the school to find ole fat boy with an ice pack on his nose… God I wish I would’ve been able to make that one lmao…..Guess what?…No more BS from him anymore……

My take on this…. You are enabling your son, with the correct tools, to face life! And yes sometimes , some of our kids need extra support, you are not just responding off the cuff, or burning bridges in anger.
I think that is awesome!!!! Over the years, for us, there have been repeated issues with bussing ( not a bullying issue) and in the past a different school issue. And I have other kids still at the one school — so for their sake and mine- no bridges could be burned. However– I did manage to make myself the kind and gracious squeaky wheel!!!
I appreciate hearing where you are coming from. Knowing what you all face daily…. Mad respect.
Fellow autism, ptsd, and more family 🙂