The weather isn't going to be kind to us today, and that kills the chances of walking outside. The boys are bored and, I need to find us all something to do. There are some things I need to do before we can do anything. Once thays done, I'm thinking about taking the kids to a dollar movie. Perhaps a movie is a good idea because I have hours to wait before getting Gavin's lab results back. I need to be distracted.
We're off to get Gavin's bloodwork done for the four time in four days. I truly hate doing this to him but it's what has to be done. I was hoping to go for a walk but the weather isn't looking too good. I'm going to be very much on edge until we get the results back this afternoon. Based in the results, will likely determine how I proceed. Waiting for the results to come in is absolutely torturous, and it eats me alive. Finger crossed, prayers sent, and positive thoughts...
If you've been reading my blog for awhile, you know that I'm under tremendous amounts of stress. If you are new or maybe even forgot, I'll do a quick recap. I'm dealing with seriously high amounts of chronic stress. I've been working to manage things but the past week or so has been really bad. We had a death in the family, oddly enough our cat was diagnosed with Crohn's disease, and Gavin's bloodwork has not been good at all. I only mentioned the cat because we thought we were going to have to put her down, so we had to prepare ourselves and the kids. That wasn't fun. I've got a million things on my mind and I feel like I'm drowning. There are a few reason I absolutely…
Let me begin by saying thank you for all the thoughts and prayers that have come in from all over the world. Lizze and I are truly grateful for all of you. ☺ I have quite a bit of information to share and I'm trying to do it in an effective way. Feel free to ask questions below and I'll do my best to answer or clarify. First things first. Gavin's lab results came back today and his numbers are up. They are up alot, but they are higher than yesterday, so that's an enormous blessing. His Neutrophil levels are back to 2.1 and his white cell count is 3.4. The reality is, his numbers are scraping the bottom of the okay range and we aren't sure why. I spoke…
After bringing Gavin home from his bloodwork this morning, I crashed in the couch. I haven't eaten or slept well, since this all began. It's not like I slept super well anyway. After I woke up, I felt a little better but I have quite a few phone calls to make today. I need to suck it up and get through this.
Emmett wine up in a horrible mood today, making everything more difficult. We had to get Lizze to an appointment, and then Gavin to get his lab work done. Neither of the boys wanted to go anywhere, and thankfully, Lizze's appointment was canceled at the last minute, whole we were in the parking lot waiting. This is the one time that a cancelation like this works out for the best. I took everyone home before Gavin and I went to the blood lab. I'm so nervous, but I see how strong Gavin is being and that's pretty inspirational.
This morning begins the new routine of blood work every single day. I'm not sure about Sunday's because the lab is closed. Either way, Gavin's now facing at least ten needle sticks a week. When I explained to Gavin last night, about the need to daily bloodwork, he broke down and cried. I didn't go into details about why it was necessary because he wouldn't have understood anyway. What I told him was that the doctor needs to keep an eye on some things in your blood. All he heard from that whole conversation was that he was getting blood work every day. The poor kid is terrified, and I hate having to put him through this. At the second time, the alternative just isn't okay. What would be nice…
I'm so out of sorts right now. I'm scared to death about what's going to happen to Gavin. It's probably safe to say that I'm not handling it well at the moment. I've got so much nervous energy, I can't stop my leg from bouncing up and down on the floor. I ended up jumping down Lizze's throat, over something that was stupid. I shouldn't have done that. I'm so on edge, that I'm simply have no patience. I feel sick to my stomach and I keep closing my eyes, hoping that when I open them, this would all have been a dream.