I was absolutely horrified by what my son with #Autism told me today

He explained that he had a really bad nightmare. In this nightmare, someone was slicing his (Gavin’s) hands open with the a large knife. That was creepy enough but it’s who did the cutting that was the most concerning. 

Gavin explained that the person who was slicing his (Gavin’s) hands open was his biological father. He even referred to him by his first name, which I won’t repeat. 

Without going into to great detail, Gavin’s biological father was very abusive, as was the his paternal grandparents.  

I’ve raised Gavin since he was about fifteen months old and he’s not had contact with his biological father in almost a decade. He wanted nothing to do with Gavin but the paternal grandparents forced him to fight, so they could see Gavin. It was absolutely messed up, unhealthy and well documented. 

The fact that Gavin had this dream out of nowhere is concerning because this guy hasn’t been talked about in so long. 

We know Gavin and Lizze were both abused. Gavin would come home from forced visitations with injuries that were beyond those of a typical toddler.  

Both of those things are documented as well. He never came home with cuts on his hands or anything like that but he did have cuts on his feet once. 

Does this nightmare mean anything? Is he remembering something from his past, just not exactly the way it happened?

Gavin was never able to talk about these things back then. Maybe it’s just some weird, random thing that popped up..  

I’m always worried about Gavin because there’s always something to be worried about. This caught me off guard in a big way. We briefly talked about it with Dr. Pattie today but ran out of time before we could really discuss anything with her. Gavin did tell her about it though.  

As a parent, I don’t want him reliving anything that happened to him when he was with that part of his family. They’ve been gone forever now and I’d like him to be able to have as little memory of the terrible things that happened to him as possible. 

This trauma in his past, did gift him with PTSD. That’s where Lizze received it from as well.

In a weird way, Gavin being who he is and having such a bad memory, has worked out to his advantage in this particular area of his life. 

This showing up out of nowhere just sorta freaked me out a little.  

Gavin doesn’t know anything about the concern, because that’s a grownup issue. He just knows he had a really bad nightmare where people were beating the crap out of him and it ended with his biological father cutting his hands open with a knife… That’s the long and short of it… 

Memories and dreams are fascinating things and I don’t know what, if anything, this means…. 

13 comments

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    • Jan on September 13, 2018 at 12:06 pm
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    You and your family will be in my prayers!

  1. Comfort your son with peace, he is surrounded by and empowered by ❤️ love.
    The Love he has now is strong and true. L❤️VE gave your son the power to grow confident, powerful and free (severing) the pain of his past
    ✨Peace ❤️love is everlasting

    • USAtweeting on February 19, 2018 at 11:57 am
    • Reply

    Comfort your son with peace, he is surrounded by and empowered by ❤️ love.
    The Love he has now is strong and true. L❤️VE gave your son the power to grow confident, powerful and free (severing) the pain of his past
    ✨Peace ❤️love is everlasting

  2. My son has autism and nightmares about his biological mother. His twin sister has neither. She will say things every now and then, but not like my son does. It breaks my heart to know she treated them the way she did.

  3. My son has autism and nightmares about his biological mother. His twin sister has neither. She will say things every now and then, but not like my son does. It breaks my heart to know she treated them the way she did.

  4. I’m so sad for Gavin. I’m also a adult who had been abused as a child and repressed much of it. It came out after my ex started hitting me and very real nightmares were the way they started. Let Patty handle it. I know this is hard he has so much to handle already it seems unfair for this to pop out but his brain is letting it through because he needs to deal with it. It’s not adult things, it is part of his very sad life story. You have to be able to understand that and manage your response and your emotions. Somewhere in his world this stuff matters and he is putting things in order. It’s his story and his memories. Love him thru it as I know you will. This is gonna hurt Lizze too because it will bring up all her pain again.

  5. I’ve read somewhere PTSD is related to those who have autism – how utterly horrific for you all but at the same it’s good he trusts you enough to tell you this too. Much love

  6. I’m so sad for Gavin. I’m also a adult who had been abused as a child and repressed much of it. It came out after my ex started hitting me and very real nightmares were the way they started. Let Patty handle it. I know this is hard he has so much to handle already it seems unfair for this to pop out but his brain is letting it through because he needs to deal with it. It’s not adult things, it is part of his very sad life story. You have to be able to understand that and manage your response and your emotions. Somewhere in his world this stuff matters and he is putting things in order. It’s his story and his memories. Love him thru it as I know you will. This is gonna hurt Lizze too because it will bring up all her pain again.

  7. Awe poor little guy. You are great man to take of him and his siblings.

    I personally downloaded a dream dictionary app to get a better understanding of my dreams. It may help with understanding Gavin’s dream.

    You and your family are in my prayers.

  8. so sad and traumatic for you both, thinking of u all, and u are more his father than the other idiot xxx

  9. I’ve read somewhere PTSD is related to those who have autism – how utterly horrific for you all but at the same it’s good he trusts you enough to tell you this too. Much love

  10. Awe poor little guy. You are great man to take of him and his siblings.

    I personally downloaded a dream dictionary app to get a better understanding of my dreams. It may help with understanding Gavin’s dream.

    You and your family are in my prayers.

  11. so sad and traumatic for you both, thinking of u all, and u are more his father than the other idiot xxx

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