Some major updates about my kids

It’s been a little while since I’m written here. There have been a great many changes in my life and all of them very positive. I’m obviously still experiencing some writing burnout and I just don’t always have the bandwidth to put my thoughts into words like I used to. That said, I’m really trying to push through that and get back into writing again because it is a healthy outlet for me. For the moment, I’m just glad to be writing this. There have been so many changes over the last few months, some I’ll talk about and others, are going to remain private for now, but all are very positive. Let’s start with Gavin. Gavin has been working with a job coach to secure employment. We’ve been working…

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We sign papers for day services today

Today is a big day for Gavin. Today is the day that we sign papers for him to begin day services. This has been such a long time coming and I’m so glad we’re finally here. As I understand it, Gavin and I will be meeting with his SSA and a representative from the day center. We will talk about Gavin’s needs and create a plan that best meets them. My guess is that he will be attending at least a few days a week but it won’t start for about 30 days. Everything has to be processed and transportation arrangements must be made. It may not take a full 30 days but that’s the current estimate and Gavin’s okay with that because it gives him some time to emotionally…

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A quick update on Gavin’s transition into his adult life

It’s been a minute since I’ve updated you guys on how Gavin’s journey into his adult life is going. There’s a few reasons for that but one of them is that not much has changed since the last update. Gavin was getting overwhelmed by all the changes he was perceiving and wanted everything to slow down. I was not in a good place myself and being able to take a step back helped me find my footing and catch my breath. At the same time, Gavin was still continuing his job coaching. He meets every week with his job coach to practice interviews, and work on his resume. Last week Gavin expressed interest in day services again. Day services would give him things to do during the day. There’s social…

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Learning to Self-Advocate

It’s been a really long day and I’m calling it a night but before I do, I want to shine a spotlight on Gavin for a few minutes. Gavin had a big day today, and I want to recognize some significant accomplishments. I will not go into much detail here because I want to record a podcast episode about this later. Gavin had two appointments today. The first was at the Cleveland Clinic. Gavin’s been dealing with depression, and we were meeting with his doctor to discuss the possibility of starting him on an anti-depressant. I’ve never been a massive fan of medication, despite all the meds Gavin’s been on. I’ve learned over the years that sometimes medication is a necessity to improve quality of life. The proper medication used…

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How a Dump Cake Brought 2 Brothers Together

It was a really fun day. It was super busy and I had multiple meetings but it was a good day. Things are definitely looking up for us here in The Autism Dad household and I’m so grateful for that. The boys got off to school without a problem and in between meetings, Gavin and I spoke about his new found love of baking. He informed me the other day that he finds baking to be relaxing. As he’s been stressed out a bit more lately with all the transitional changes in his life, he’s been baking a lot more. https://www.facebook.com/100050605414132/posts/pfbid0jvxgB5uzPSv5pxkdsARGhvr4g15UCuKWsNcganyLXbKwkWdU7AM6tzpsD1X1v416l/?mibextid=cr9u03 The other day, someone sent me a recipe for Gavin to try and after discussing it, Gavin wanted to give it a go. He and I went to Giant…

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Am I the only parent who struggled with this?

I’ve been meaning to talk about this for a while because I think we should be open and honest about this. Here we go. I’ve been very focused on Gavin transitioning into adulthood. He’s almost 23 years old, and this has been a long time coming. It’s also been met with several delays, mainly due to COVID. Anyway, one of the things I struggled with was admitting that Gavin moving out was in everyone’s best interests. It’s in Gavin’s best interest, but it’s best for the rest of us as well. This is where I’ve struggled emotionally with this whole thing. Gavin is among the most amazing humans I’ve ever known, but he’s not always easy to coexist with. His behaviors can be overwhelming and very frustrating for me as…

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The Journey to Independence: Progress does not require perfection

If you’ve been following our journey, you know that Gavin has come such a long way. He’s doing so well compared to where he was. However, I think it’s important also to state that improvement doesn’t mean perfection. There are still struggles, and they can be challenging to manage. Today was one of those days where I’m reminded of this. Gavin told me he was going to shave this afternoon. It’s hugely positive that he sometimes recognizes and prompts himself to do this without reminders. I’m proud of this little victory, and I told him that. He ate lunch and then went to the bathroom to shave. Gavin shaves with an electric/rechargeable razor. He gets about 80% of the job done independently but still needs help to get what he…

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Helping My Kids Transition to Adulthood is Challenging

Making the switch from parenting young kids with autism to teens and adults can be challenging. Kids grow up so fast, and their needs change as they get older. The teen and young adult years are particularly tough because the push toward independence kicks into high gear. There are so many overlapping behaviors, and I'm learning that some teen stuff is normal. Autism and ADHD will always play a role, but at the end of the day, they're still teenage boys, and they're going to be going through adolescent boy stuff. My current focus is on helping Gavin to move out of the house and move on with his life. We (my incredibly supportive gf and I) have had several meetings with the Department of DD already, and Gavin has…

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