Read more about the article Gavin now needs weekly blood work
Clozapine / Gavin / My thoughts

Gavin now needs weekly blood work

As we begin the new year, our Monday plans are already being adjusted because of the holiday. Gavin was supposed to get his labs drawn today but I'm not sure if they'll be open because of the holiday. If they aren't, we'll simply have to move things to Tuesday morning. It must happen Monday or Tuesday because he's out of Clozapine for Wednesday. As long as his labs are good by Wednesday, we'll have the script by the end of the day. This makes Gavin a bit nervous but it will all work out.

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January 1, 2018
Read more about the article A special New Years message
Inspirational Posts / My thoughts

A special New Years message

I wanted to take a minute and wish all of my readers, wherever they may be, a safe and happy New Year. I hope that we all find peace and happiness in the New Year. My wish for 2018 is that we can all come together, despite our differences and see one another for the truly amazing human beings we are. Allowing things like race, religion, sexual orientation, gender identity, ethnicity and even political beliefs to divide us must stop. As individuals, we need to make a decision about what we want our lives to mean. We must decide what kind of world we want our kids going up in. Let's make 2018 a year where hate and bigotry are outweighed by love and acceptance. Let's teach our kids to…

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January 1, 2018
Read more about the article I like to focus on what he CAN do and less on the things he can’t
Gavin / Inspirational Posts / My thoughts

I like to focus on what he CAN do and less on the things he can’t

For all Gavin's struggles, and they are many, he still does some pretty amazing things. While he'll never be independent, that doesn't mean he's not gaining some independence. ☺ Every single morning, Gavin begins his day with a bowl of oatmeal. He makes it all by himself and when he doesn't have chocolate chips to mix in, he simply cuts up an apple instead. He used a special tool we have that let's him safely cut up and remove the core of an apple. He doesn't use a knife, especially unsupervised. My whole point here is that it's important that I focus on things like this because it's so easy to get wrapped up in the things he can't do. The reality is, there are a great many things he…

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December 31, 2017
Read more about the article A good start to New Years Eve
My thoughts

A good start to New Years Eve

The boys will be home soon and our time alone will be coming to an end. Lizze is still sleeping, so I'm not sure how she's feeling today. It's New Years Eve and I don't think we have any plans. I did mentioned to the boys that we could have a family game night with some of the boardgames they received for Christmas. Emmett was the only one excited by that idea. I want to keep things as calm as possible tonight. The kids need to sleep and I don't want to be up all night. In fact, I don't remember the last time Lizze and I stayed up to watch the ball drop. The boys are hopefully going to be in a good place when they get home from…

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December 31, 2017
Read more about the article Depression Confessions: 2 weeks into withdrawaling from #Paxil
Depression Confessions / My thoughts

Depression Confessions: 2 weeks into withdrawaling from #Paxil

Depression Confessions exists to help facilitate an open and honest about how depression impacts my life. Depression is different for everyone but there are still many common threads and we shouldn't be afraid to talk about it. I've been talking about my ongoing war with depression for many years now and it's a liberating experience. I encourage everyone to be open and honest with the people in your lives about how depression is impacting you. Silence and shame are two of depressions greatest allies. I'm writing today to update you on how my journey to withdrawal from antidepressants is going. I've been on Paxil and Wellbutrin for many, many years now but it was time to come off the meds and see where I'm at. This was a big decision…

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December 31, 2017
Read more about the article Guess who’s got the night off
My thoughts

Guess who’s got the night off

The boys are at their Grandparents house and that means we're childless for the night. Lizze is not feeling well and so she's sleeping. I was able to get some grocery shopping done and now I'm settling in to watch the Blade Runner movies. I've never seen them and I'm pretty sure Lizze wouldn't be interested, so this works out. Right now, it's just me, the dogs, some french bread pizza and streaming the Blade Runner movies via Chromecast to the Xbox. I'm feeling good and look forward to a quiet evening.

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December 30, 2017
Read more about the article Withdrawaling from #Paxil is causing new problem
Confessions / Depression Management / Medications / My thoughts

Withdrawaling from #Paxil is causing new problem

This whole withdrawaling from Paxil has been a really difficult journey thus far. The first week of tapering down felt like the worst case of the flu I've ever had. It lasted about a week but has since subsided. I thought I was in the clear until the next phase starts in a few weeks. Unfortunately, that has proven not to be true. While I'm not sick anymore, I'm dealing with really bad insomnia instead. To be completely honest, I'm not sure which is worse, feeling like shit or not sleeping. The insomnia began shortly after the nausea, body aches and headaches ended. I'm really struggling to get any sleep at night. I've tried over the counter sleep aides and Melatonin but nothing works. The problem is that my brain…

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December 29, 2017
Read more about the article Family therapy just took a heartbreaking and unexpected turn
Family Therapy / Gavin / My thoughts

Family therapy just took a heartbreaking and unexpected turn

Family therapy has become a routine thing for my family. It's important that we stay ahead of anything that's going on and ensure that the kids are getting what they need. Parenting three kids with Autism and various other special needs, makes it damn near impossible to meet all their needs. Therapy helps us to make sure that we're at least meeting the most important ones. Anyway, last night was pretty routine, right up until the end of the session. I honestly don't even remember what triggered this but basically, out of nowhere, Gavin had a total breakdown. He starts sobbing and we finally get out of him what's causing him distress. Apparently, Gavin is having thoughts of punching people in the face. He isn't wanting to act on it,…

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December 29, 2017