Read more about the article I’ve been feeling overwhelmed today
My thoughts

I’ve been feeling overwhelmed today

I'm finding myself feeling a bit overwhelmed today. I'm relieved that Gavin is less vulnerable to COVID because that's been a big worry for a long time. I'm relieved that the boys are doing better in school because remote learning has been a challenge. I'm also relieved that I won the power struggle with the stupid dog over going potty outside. Work has been incredibly slow this month, meaning March is going to be a leaner month and will likely present some challenges. That could literally change at any time though because I pick up new client all the time, some big and some small. I'm working on a few longer term projects at the moment and invoicing is still a couple weeks out. I've spent the last few days…

2 Comments
February 23, 2021
Read more about the article How I’m doing after increasing my antidepressant
My thoughts

How I’m doing after increasing my antidepressant

I mentioned last week that I would be speaking to my doctor about bumping up my antidepressant. After discussing things, we decided to double my current dose. I've been on 20mg/day of Prozac and I'm now on 40mg/day. I think I'm on day four or five of the new dose and there really isn't any news to report. It's likely to be a few weeks before I see any changes, if I'm going to see any changes. It may be a little faster because I've already been on Prozac for a couple of years. Either way, I feel good about the change. Outside of that, I need to lower my triglycerides a bit and continue losing weight. I'm in good health and I will rerun my labs in six months…

1 Comment
February 22, 2021
Read more about the article Gavin’s in rough shape after his 2nd dose of the #COVID #vaccine
COVID19 / Gavin / My thoughts / Vaccines

Gavin’s in rough shape after his 2nd dose of the #COVID #vaccine

It's been a challenging weekend and I haven't been keeping up with the blog as a result. This will be a super quick update and I'll do more when I can. I wanted to let you guys know how Gavin is doing after his second dose of the Pfizer COVID vaccine. He recieved it at 3:30 pm on Friday. He was fine until late last night. When he finally woke me up at 6:30 am, he was in rough shape. So far his symptoms are massive headache, body aches, chills, and a whole lot of exhaustion. He also says that 2/3 of his spine aches, whatever the hell that means. There's no nausea or anything like that. I'm grateful for that because vomiting would have only made a bad situation…

2 Comments
February 20, 2021
Read more about the article Gavin gets his final dose of the #COVID #vaccine today
COVID19 / Gavin / Lockdown / My thoughts / Planning / Vaccines

Gavin gets his final dose of the #COVID #vaccine today

It's gonna be a hectic day. I have a two hour meeting after lunch and it should finish up just in time for me to get Gavin to the health department for his second dose of the Pfizer COVID vaccine. I'm a little concerned about how Gavin is going to handle the side effects. More than that, I'm concerned about how severe the side effects will be for him because of all his health issues. The vaccine is absolutely vital for him and I'm not worried about its safety at all. Most people experience side effects, which is expected. I just don't know how they will impact him, personally. Gavin decided to do his IVIG infusion a day early so he wasn't putting too much strain on his body today.…

0 Comments
February 19, 2021
Read more about the article Why I’m increasing my antidepressant today
Confessions / Depression Management / Medications / My thoughts

Why I’m increasing my antidepressant today

I gave myself one week to grieve the loss of my marriage and that week was officially over. While I'm not hitting the ground running, at least as quickly as I was hoping, I am moving forward. In a little while, I have an appointment with my PCP over the phone, due to COVID. I've made the decision to talk to my doctor about increasing my antidepressant. The reason behind this is that I recognize that everything has taken a toll on me and while I'm not defeated, I'm also not in total control either. Depression is influencing me a bit more than I'm comfortable with right now, and frankly, it has been. The last couple of years have been difficult and I've been dealing with a lot. COVID has…

1 Comment
February 17, 2021
Read more about the article My life can be hair pulling and trying to herd cats kinda fun
My thoughts

My life can be hair pulling and trying to herd cats kinda fun

So we had a little drama this evening and while it's not a huge deal, it perfectly illiterates some of the unique challenges I'm trying to manage. We have a Soda Stream and the kids use it to carbonate their water. We've pretty much removed most of the sugary drinks from our lives. Anyway, I had to swap out the CO2 canister yesterday and for whatever reason, Emmett went and swapped it out again. Basically, he swapped a full canister for a full canister. That's not a huge deal because I can just swap it back when this one is empty. The problem was that I found it on the edge of the table in the kitchen. These canisters are under pressure and while they're safe, you don't necessarily want…

0 Comments
February 15, 2021
Read more about the article I gave myself 1 week to grieve
My thoughts

I gave myself 1 week to grieve

As you know by now, I finalized my divorce about a week ago. If you been following for any length of time, you know that this was an emotionally complicated experience for me. This wasn't something I wanted and I didn't understand what happened. Fast forward a year and a half, and I've accepted that my marriage was ending. I'm not happy about it but I do understand it's for the best. As I've said before, the person I married doesn't exist anymore. It's not meant to be an insult to her either. People change and she totally acknowledges that. One of the complicated things for me is coming to grips with this. It's been challenging for me at times and dealing with depression doesn't help. My whole point is…

0 Comments
February 15, 2021
Read more about the article I’m reprioritizing my daily life
My thoughts

I’m reprioritizing my daily life

I'm kinda pushing myself to get through today. Nothing drastic has changed but I'm feeling anxious and overwhelmed. I'm relieved that my life is finally moving forward and I can begin implementing some of the things I've been waiting to do. That's all positive. At the same time, however, I feel depleted and out of sorts. I slept pretty good last night and that's good. The problem I believe, is more about the years of stress, pain, and exhaustion that have culminated since 2014. All of that has finally reached its conclusion, and I don't have to be strong or stoic anymore for myself or my kids. I'm able to let myself feel these things now. I'm starting over and in order to do that, I have to go through…

0 Comments
February 14, 2021