Mr. Gavin drove both Lizze and I crazy today. The constant talking and random questions grated on what was left of our sanity after the meltdowns from his younger brother.

I feel really bad getting frustrated with him because he truly has no idea what he’s doing. When we remind him, it’s an exercise in futility because two minutes later, he’s already forgotten.

The icing on the cake of frustration today was his IVIG infusion.

An hour or so into what was supposed to be his infusion, I pointed out to him that it looks like it’s moving slow. Turns out he forgot to turn the damn thing on and sat there for over an hour, with nothing happening. Normally, he’s Johnny on the spot when it comes to his infusions.

Today he was paranoid that the infusion that hadn’t even started yet was leaking. He was also very focused on playing his video games and between the two, neglected his infusion.

We supervise and administer the infusion but it’s his job to monitor it while it’s in process. He needs to be able to manage as much of this on his own as possible because he will need this at least twice a week for the rest of his life.

Anyway, what should have taken an hour or so to complete, ended up taking over four hours tonight. It could have been one of those times where it’s just slow or it’s the result of him fiddling with the needles because he was afraid they were going to leak.

Either way, it sucked.

I’m exhausted from today but that’s pretty much par for the course when you’re an Autism parent.

Sometimes, I truly feel it’s a blessing to make it to the end of the day without collapsing under the weight of all that needs to happen.

At the same time, I’m grateful for each day I have with my kids. Along with the stress, exhaustion, and hairloss, they make me laugh, smile and remember how lucky I am to have them in my life.