I’ve officially applied to Make A Wish for my son

At 2 am this morning, I was unable to sleep. I've got many things on my mind and I couldn't shutdown. One of those things weighing heavy was this whole Make-A-Wish thing for Gavin. I began the process after Gavin's immunologist suggested we apply last year. The process halted for a variety of reasons, but two reasons created the most friction. The first of which was Gavin didn't want to do anything. If he was unwilling to participate, there's no point in continuing. The second reason was more emotional on my part. Knowing your child qualifies for Make-A-Wish is a doubled edged sword. On the one hand, it's such an amazing opportunity for Gavin. On the other hand, he qualified in the first place. To qualify, things have to be serious about…

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He’s getting worse and I can’t hide from that truth anymore

It's becoming more and more difficult to pretend that Gavin's not getting worse. I know he's never going to get better, and that's something both my wife and me have come to accept over the years. While I've accepted that fact, it's not that cut and dry. Gavin's in an almost constant state of decompensation. Sometimes it's a slower process, and harder to pick up on, while other times, it's pretty rapid. One of the main issues revolves around his memory. I tend to want to rationalize it by saying something like, he's just having a bad day or everyone forgets things. The truth is, it's not normal to forget things like Gavin does. It's not normal and it's not a good. Here's the latest example of what I mean.…

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A degree of normalcy buried beneath a shitload of #Autism 

The boys definitely were having a rougher day yesterday. Elliott and Emmett can be best friends or worst enemies. I suppose that's part for the course when it comes to brothers.  There is a degree of normalcy here but it's buried beneath a shitload of triggers, and made worse because of inabilities to cope.  I'm thinking we need to keep them as occupied as possible this summer. They tend to get along better when they're occupied.  Another issue we're running into is space. The boys each need their own space, and that's not easy to come by in our house. Gavin has his own room, but Elliott is getting to the age where he's needing space of his own, and outside of his bed, he doesn't have it.  Neither Elliott…

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Read more about the article Another picture of the baby Bluejay from yesterday (Photography)
Another picture of the baby Bluejay from yesterday (Photography) This guy was just so cute, and I have a bunch of pictures I'll share.

Another picture of the baby Bluejay from yesterday (Photography)

Another picture of the baby Bluejay from yesterday (Photography) This guy was just so cute, and I have a bunch of pictures I'll share. I haven't seen him again, but the parents are still around being super protective.  Thankfully, Maggie isn't a dog that goes after little creatures like this. She may sniff it a bit but that's all.  Anyway, this picture turned out pretty well.. ☺ 

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Read more about the article We had a special little visitor yesterday afternoon (Photography)
We had a special little visitor yesterday afternoon (Photography) I stumbled across this little guy on our front porch. It's Mom and Dad were acting very concerned. I went out to make sure there wasn't a stray cat causing a problem, but couldn't find anything. I sat and watched the parents for awhile, in hopes of getting some indication of what was wrong. Eventually I found this little baby Bluejay under our flower box. After a few pictures, I move it to a safer location and did so without upsetting the baby. It was really cool.

We had a special little visitor yesterday afternoon (Photography)

We had a special little visitor yesterday afternoon (Photography) I stumbled across this little guy on our front porch. It's Mom and Dad were acting very concerned. I went out to make sure there wasn't a stray cat causing a problem, but couldn't find anything. I sat and watched the parents for awhile, in hopes of getting some indication of what was wrong. Eventually I found this little baby Bluejay under our flower box. After a few pictures, I move it to a safer location and did so without upsetting the baby. It was really cool.

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How conflicting #sensory needs can lead to chaos

I'm overwhelmed by the kids today, not that it's breaking news, but I'm pushing through my fitness goals for today anyway.  It's days like this that tend to really sorta break me. The stress alone barrels over my self-control like a run away freight train. This is historically, a major weakness on my part.  Today however, I'm doing okay.  I had my usual yogurt medley for breakfast, and I already completed my first session on the treadmill. I'm obviously getting some writing done, and I've caught up on some emails that I needed to get out.  They boys are at each other's throats because they are each triggering negative behaviors from the other. I don't think it's necessarily intentional, but it's definitely a problem.  I've mentioned before that the boys…

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Slowly erroding away my sanity

Today has been full of meltdowns thus far. Emmett is in a horrible mood this afternoon, and when he's in a horrible mood, everyone around him knows it.  The weather is shitty and there isn't much that can be done outside today.  I was up with Elliott for most of the night because he was upset and unable to sleep. Out the gate, I'm at a disadvantage, as my resources have been depleted.  Gavin's been sleeping for the last few hours, even through all the meltdowns. I wish I was able to filter things out like that. lol I'm not sure how I'm going to survive today. The screaming is slowly by surely erroding any my sanity.. O_o

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