I have a Man Cold and there are a few things I need to say before I die 



As it turns out, this isn’t allergies. I fear it’s something far worse and more nefarious than I could have ever imagined. 

I’m reluctant to announce that I’m pretty sure that this is a worst case scenario situation. It’s a man cold and I’m not sure I’m gonna make it. The sneezing, stuffiness, headache, cough, sore throat and watery eyes, just might kill me.  

The name ‘man cold’ disguises the true terrible, debilitating disease that is the man cold. Nearly all men will die from man colds unless they are administered immediately with large amounts of mindless TV such as daytime TV, or childrens’ cartoons. It is essential that they not move from bed or a comfy sofa to allow for rehabilitation, and must have tissues and man cold medicine (such as chocolate biscuits, McDonalds, or a nice cup of tea) brought to them constantly by a nearby female.
– The Urban Dictionary 



As I’m on my own now and as a single Dad, there’s no one to nurse me back to health. Left to my own devices, I’m not sure I’ll be able to pull through. 

Most of my readers are women and Mothers but there has to be a few guys out there who are reading this and understand the gravity of the situation I’m in.

In the event that I don’t make it, I wanted to say a few things and clear my conscience. 



To my children, I’m sorry you have to watch me suffer through a Man Cold. Thankfully you’re young enough and most of you have at least a decade before having to face this awful virus that so cruelly makes your eyes water. We all know it becomes incredibly difficult to watch TV with watery eyes. 

  
To my amazingly supportive parents, I ate the last piece of ice cream cake in your freezer. While it was truly delicious, the guilt I’ve been carrying for the last 3 or 4 days has been unbearable.

To my ex-wife, I’m sorry that I would lick all four corners of the pizza during our time together. I just really like corner pieces because the crust is, you know, perfect. 

To anyone else I’ve wronged over my 37 years of life, I want to say that you should probably just go ahead and forgive me now because this is a Man Cold after all and you may not get another chance. 

Adding insult to injury and I’m not looking for sympathy here, but the volume buttons on the remote control don’t work. I’m forced to leave the safety and mild comfort of the couch, to adjust the volume manually. It’s a solid 5 or 6 feet away and my eyes are watery. It’s cruelty in its purest form.

Man Cold, have you no mercy?

If you are unfamiliar with the term Man Cold, here’s a couple of videos to help you educate yourself.. 

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About Rob Gorski

Father to 3 with Autism and husband to my best friend. Oh...and creator fo this blog. :-)

  

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Rob, my malware bytes flagged your site as malicious 3 different times today.

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It’s an error. I use Malware Bytes and I don’t have it flagged. Sometimes it detects code inserted into the header as malicious but it’s not. The code is out there for a reason for things like sharing buttons etc.
Thanks for pointing it out and I’ll have a look when the kids go to dinner tonight.

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Rob, my malware bytes flagged your site as malicious 3 different times today.

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It’s an error. I use Malware Bytes and I don’t have it flagged. Sometimes it detects code inserted into the header as malicious but it’s not. The code is out there for a reason for things like sharing buttons etc.
Thanks for pointing it out and I’ll have a look when the kids go to dinner tonight.

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Oh no… the dreaded man cold!!! My husband caught that cold a couple of weeks ago and he thought he was dying. And then I caught it, and brought him tissues, while wiping my own nose and hacking out a lung, I had the woman cold, which pales in comparision. To put the man cold in perspective, my husband has cancer and was on his 5th week of radiation. He has burns inside his mouth, tongue, throat, face lost half (yes half ) of his beard hair, has radiation burns on his neck and back. Did he complain of those… Read more »

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EllenBeck Ellen, I hope your husband’s radiation is over soon.  Best of luck and good thoughts to the both of you.

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Ellen I’m so sorry for what you guys are going through. Your husband sounds like one strong dude. You both are in my thoughts and prayers. Stay strong. ❤️❤️❤️

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Guest

Oh no… the dreaded man cold!!! My husband caught that cold a couple of weeks ago and he thought he was dying. And then I caught it, and brought him tissues, while wiping my own nose and hacking out a lung, I had the woman cold, which pales in comparision. To put the man cold in perspective, my husband has cancer and was on his 5th week of radiation. He has burns inside his mouth, tongue, throat, face lost half (yes half ) of his beard hair, has radiation burns on his neck and back. Did he complain of those… Read more »

Guest
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EllenBeck Ellen, I hope your husband’s radiation is over soon.  Best of luck and good thoughts to the both of you.

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Ellen I’m so sorry for what you guys are going through. Your husband sounds like one strong dude. You both are in my thoughts and prayers. Stay strong. ❤️❤️❤️