Why does my son with #autism refuse to go to school?

Totally not trying to be a negative Nancy but today has already been a nightmare.

Emmett once again refused to go to school because he wasn’t feeling well. This morning was one massive meltdown, that still has me know edge.

I haven’t a clue what’s behind this, aside from anxiety.

 



Emmett is a very anxious kid by nature and it makes sense that if he’s upset or anxious about something, that he would get a tummy ache.

I’m at a total loss.

I talked to his teacher yesterday and she’s doing everything she can to reassure him that she’s there to help him during the day and that schools a safe place.

Once he’s there,  he does just fine but it’s getting him there that’s the problem.

He’s not making this up and he’s genuinely in distress,  so this isn’t just a get out of school kinda thing.

I truly hate the idea of forcing him because he then feels like I don’t believe him and his anxiety skyrockets.

At the same time,  I can’t keep him home every day.

I’ve made sure that nothing was going on at school that was a problem.  Everyone loves Emmett and there’s no bullying of any kind.

I don’t think he understands why he’s not feeling good and this is just as hard on him as it is for me. .  😦

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    • Guest on September 30, 2015 at 1:19 am

    For Rob that’s impossible.

    • Guest on February 19, 2018 at 1:07 pm
    • Reply

    For Rob that’s impossible.

    • Guest on September 29, 2015 at 7:18 pm

    Your right, and at the time it wasn’t a valid option for me either it was the only option

    • Guest on September 29, 2015 at 7:01 pm

    That’s not a valid option for all parents though.

    • Guest on September 29, 2015 at 7:00 pm

    Hope that’s something you can address in therapy tonight.

    • Guest on September 29, 2015 at 6:25 pm

    And the Homeschool community is so happy to count you guys among us!

    • Guest on September 29, 2015 at 6:06 pm

    I hope things get better for Emmett. My daughter wouldn’t give me problems going to school in last 8 yrs. Well now she is. She started high school. It’s a new school..New schedule..new teacher..school is crowded & bigger. It’s horrible. 🙁 She comes home crying. Her anxiety level is high. I totally understand your worrying for Emmett. U0001f622 I hope our kiddos get to feeling ok soon.

    • Guest on September 29, 2015 at 5:59 pm

    I stopped forcing mine, 4 years ago and started homeschooling. We couldn’t be happier!!!!

    • Guest on September 29, 2015 at 5:28 pm

    Maybe only do half days for a while? School not long started back and getting back into routine can be so hard for any kid let alone one with autism. It may be that the full days are just too over stimulating for him. Does he have a watch? If not maybe a digital watch with numbers on it and let him know at X:xx you will be there to pick him up whether its half day or full day, having that reassurance in a visual aid might help.

    • Guest on September 29, 2015 at 5:15 pm

    have been through this with my son…..one year it was a bully issue from a “Typical kid” on the playground ( His teachers didn’t realize it was happening, His Little sister’s BFF defended him and got sent to office for fighting, and THAT’s how i found out)…One year it was bullying from another kid in His self contained classroom who also rode his bus…..several times it has been sensory related…PE too loud and unstructured….fire drill bell….Heat….The chaos that is the Cafeteria at Lunch time…..and most recently this year it’s because His teacher had not set up His visual schedule yet ( first month of school was chaos)

    • Guest on September 29, 2015 at 5:05 pm

    it is the same with my son! when we get to the gate he begs me not to leave him . My heart aches!

    • Guest on September 29, 2015 at 5:01 pm

    I force mine, always have, its been hell on earth, police intervention, couple of court sessions..I’m sorry ..I no real good thoughts on this subject..

    • Guest on February 19, 2018 at 1:07 pm
    • Reply

    Your right, and at the time it wasn’t a valid option for me either it was the only option

    • Guest on February 19, 2018 at 1:07 pm
    • Reply

    That’s not a valid option for all parents though.

    • Guest on February 19, 2018 at 1:07 pm
    • Reply

    Hope that’s something you can address in therapy tonight.

    • Guest on February 19, 2018 at 1:07 pm
    • Reply

    And the Homeschool community is so happy to count you guys among us!

    • Guest on February 19, 2018 at 2:15 pm
    • Reply

    I hope things get better for Emmett. My daughter wouldn’t give me problems going to school in last 8 yrs. Well now she is. She started high school. It’s a new school..New schedule..new teacher..school is crowded &#038 bigger. It’s horrible. 🙁 She comes home crying. Her anxiety level is high. I totally understand your worrying for Emmett. U0001f622 I hope our kiddos get to feeling ok soon.

    • Guest on February 19, 2018 at 1:07 pm
    • Reply

    I stopped forcing mine, 4 years ago and started homeschooling. We couldn’t be happier!!!!

    • Guest on February 19, 2018 at 1:07 pm
    • Reply

    Maybe only do half days for a while? School not long started back and getting back into routine can be so hard for any kid let alone one with autism. It may be that the full days are just too over stimulating for him. Does he have a watch? If not maybe a digital watch with numbers on it and let him know at X:xx you will be there to pick him up whether its half day or full day, having that reassurance in a visual aid might help.

    • Guest on February 19, 2018 at 1:07 pm
    • Reply

    have been through this with my son…..one year it was a bully issue from a “Typical kid” on the playground ( His teachers didn’t realize it was happening, His Little sister’s BFF defended him and got sent to office for fighting, and THAT’s how i found out)…One year it was bullying from another kid in His self contained classroom who also rode his bus…..several times it has been sensory related…PE too loud and unstructured….fire drill bell….Heat….The chaos that is the Cafeteria at Lunch time…..and most recently this year it’s because His teacher had not set up His visual schedule yet ( first month of school was chaos)

    • Guest on February 19, 2018 at 1:07 pm
    • Reply

    it is the same with my son! when we get to the gate he begs me not to leave him . My heart aches!

    • Guest on February 19, 2018 at 1:07 pm
    • Reply

    I force mine, always have, its been hell on earth, police intervention, couple of court sessions..I’m sorry ..I no real good thoughts on this subject..

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