If you’re here to judge, keep moving and don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out

Let me start by saying that I’ve got no issues with a difference of opinion or a spirited debate.  I do have an issue with personal attacks on myself or my readers. 

We never have to agree on anything and I can still respect you for your opinion.  Be civil, respectful and treat people the way you would want to be treated. 

Yesterday I posted something about our water getting turned off.  The purpose of the post was not to create troll bait but instead to try and help others, using my current situation.


The whole point was to show that shit happens. It’s not pleasant but no matter what, you have to keep your chin up, keep moving forward and don’t give in. 

Rather than take that as a positive post, some people feel the need to judge, ridicule and make assumptions that are ridiculously off base. 

Yes, I’m aware that I put myself out there and I don’t mind constructive criticism but judgement is something much different. 

The purpose of this blog is to provide comfort and support to the Autism community. 

My blog has gotten so big that I can realistically make a decent living through ad revenue, sponsored posts and leasing ad space.  Being able to help others while providing for my family is a perfect solution for a very complex problem.

I share the things I share because it’s what happens in my life.  My story has been vetted many times over the years and I’ve won tons of awards for my writing.  I’ve been internationally recognized for my contributions as well. 

Whether you get something from my efforts or not, many other do. 

While I don’t publicly share emails and messages, I get tons of emails from people telling me how I’ve impacted their lives in a positive way. 

It’s amazing how just knowing that you aren’t alone or that others are feeling the same way, can impact someone’s life. 

That’s what I’m trying to do. 

Please take my posts within the context they were written.  I’m happy to answer questions but if you’re just here to troll, do so elsewhere. 

I’ve only had to ban 3 people in the last 6 years because my readers are amazing. If anyone comes here to cause trouble or be disrespectful to others, you will be warned and then banned. 

Remember that you can help my efforts by donating, sharing my posts and by simply checking out my sponsors.  Everything helps to keep these services alive, whilst allowing me to provide for my family at the same time. 

You can find more information on how you can support my efforts by visiting here


  1. So…you don’t want comments and discussion (to drive traffic?)

    I won’t comment any longer if you are looking for a fan site, but don’t act like some of the comments made arent valid. You have posted some questionable and concerning things recently.

    • Again, you’re missing the point. I love discussion and yes it drives traffic. At the same time, I can’t have my readers being disrespected by someone with questionable motives.

      Did you read this post before commenting because I’m not sure how to make my stance any clearer.

      I have no issues with questions. I’m happy to answer within the bounds of my comfort level, which is pretty liberal. I don’t care if you have a different opinion, you’re entitled to it.

      That being said, there’s something called tact and some people lack it. It’s not so much what someone has to say but how they say it.

  2. If you could make a decent living your water wouldn’t be shut off now would it. I don’t know who you are trying to convince here. And another thing. How many times has your internet been turned off vs utilities and mortgage not getting paid? Seems you feel a greater responsibility to your ‘fans’ than you do your own children. You need a dose of reality Rob and the people you want to ban are giving it to you and that’s the real reason you want to ban them

    • Again, you’re basing everything on assumptions. Assumptions are not based on fact but instead your personal opinions.

      I don’t care what you think because I bet you wouldn’t survive a day in my shoes.

      You’re welcome to leave your thoughtless, judgemental and arrogant comments but you bring nothing positive or constructive to the conversation.

      Frankly, it’s hard to even take comments like yours as anything other than trolling.

      Nothing you said was based on fact. You have no idea what my expenses are. Do you know how many people utility shutoffs happen too? They happen to a great many people.

      I don’t judge them or make assumptions about why. I have something called compassion because there are people in far worse situations than me and I know what it’s like to be judged.

      I don’t need a dose of reality. I have plenty of reality every single day.

      The sad part is that you just don’t like what you’re reading. Maybe it makes you uncomfortable and if so, I’m perfectly okay if you want to move on to something more your speed. No hard feelings. .

      • Your words
        I can realistically make a decent living through ad revenue, sponsored posts and leasing ad space.

        I guess a decent living varies between what you and I think. It’s not uncomfortable for me to read, it’s sad. Sad knowing those boys have to grow up like that along with all the other struggles they have. I have no doubt you love them, none. But you are not doing all you can to give them a better life as evident from your own words post after lossy after post. I’ve said it before. Your priorities seem to be out of whack and I was ignored before when I said it.

        • Right now my idea of a decent living is different than yours. My priorities are out of whack and it really amazes me how someone, just as yourself, can sit I front of a screen and presume to tell me that I’m not doing all I can.

          That’s such an arrogant comment.

          Why don’t you ever comment on posts other than this kind of post? Where are you when there are things to celebrate and be proud of?

          All you do is focus on the things I’m not doing well enough or are unable to make better.

          There isn’t a person alive who’s harder on me than I am.

          Don’t you think it bothers me that I can’t do better right now? Do you think that I don’t somehow feel guilty that I can’t do better?

          You have no idea what it feels like. You have no idea what it’s like to live with the fact that on my best day, I can never do enough to meet all of my kids needs.

          You just sit in front of your tiny screen, in your perfect world, on your giant pedestal and pretend that you know what’s better for my kids than I do?

          Wow… You know, at first I was angry but now I just feel sorry for you because you can’t see anymore than you want to. You miss all the amazing things that are shared here amd instead focus on what I already know are failings on my part.

          I feel sorry for you because you wake up every single day and have this shitty outlook.

          I wake up every day and face challenges that I’m suspecting you know nothing about and would never be able to cope with. I do this and despite everything, I never give up. I keep pushing ahead and I even publically admit my shortcomings because I want others to know that this kind of stuff happens to me too.

          Please have a good night and know that I wouldn’t trade my life for anything in the world.

          • The thing that bothers me about you is that you do nothing different. Nothing. And then whine and ask people to help you out. Do you know why catholic charities turned you down? Do you? Because they believe that God helps those that help themselves. Tell me how many work from home jobs, besides this blog, have you tried? They do exist and they could put a little extra in your pocket and help you out. But you don’t. You do nothing. And I’m not the only one that only posts on these kids if things. In fact. It’s mostly only these kids of threads that get attention, at least in public. And it’s great you get emails from people that you’ve helped. But don’t let that be the only thing you can hang your hat on. Do something different and if it doesn’t work then at least you have tried. Keep doing different things until something sticks.

            And you know nothing about my world because I don’t air it out for all to see.

            And as for your other posts. I may not comment on them but those are the things you should be posting. The accomplishments, the meltdowns. Things that have something to do with the special needs parts. Not the things that you feel aren’t fair to you or will get you sympathy

            • It’s interesting that you brought up Catholic Charities because I don’t remember mentioning that specifically..

              Makes me wonder who you are behind that guest account… Hmmmm

              For the record, the problem with Catholic Charities was that they only have certain funding streams for certain things and more people to help than they have funding for.

              • Rob, not to stick my nose in, but you mentioned Catholic Charities a few weeks ago when talking about getting help to get the gas turned back on.

              • You may not have, but someone did and you said you had already tried that. I’m not anyone you know. Just a reader that came across your blog randomly from Missouri

    • Alyssa Rogers Williams

      Somehow I missed this blog post…..

      Mo….you just don’t get it. Sad.

      Extreme judgement is all you offer, and unless you have 3 extreme special needs kids like Rob does than you have zero right to judge.

      Sure you can ask concerned questions like many of us readers do, but you seem to want to skewer Rob or play “gotcha” with his words.

      Why are you reading? If it’s to learn about autism (that’s how I arrived due to a friend’s child’s diagnosis) then stay and learn……but if it’s to judge and cast aspersions , then go somewhere else to pick apart someone who is trying to literally swim against the current, while trying to take care of these children by himself. I’m no apologist, just a realist.

      And yes, Rob, it’s just trolling. There are no constructive contributions, nothing but criticism. No thoughtful insights.

      To those like Mo who throw the “make a decent living” or ” get a real job” at Rob…..WHERE would his children go? He’s on his own. Day care is astronomical and I doubt they would be accepted due to their respective disabilities, or conversely it would be in the thousands per month.

      I try to ignore the ignorance/arrogance combo in any comments section but the mean spiritedness and lack of compassion plus rampant judgement here compelled me to today. Sorry it’s days late, it’s over but man, the world would be such a better place without the constant sourpuss judgemental people who have zero idea what the next person over is going through.

      • That’s kinda how I feel. Whether it’s directed at me or anyone else in a difficult situation, armchair quarterbacking never works out and it’s almost never as easy or simple as you think it is. Well said and thank you for not only your support of me but also your friends family. smile

  3. Rob, I need to ask the question… if the blog has gotten so big that you can realistically make a decent living from it, then why aren’t you? Or were you speaking theoretically? I’m mostly asking because you mentioned last week that you were short on server fees for the month, so it would seem that the blog isn’t even paying for itself, much less making you a decent living. Color me confused.

    • Right before Lizze left, Lost and Tired was ranked 27,000 in the world and 14,000 in the US. That’s out of over 1, 000,000,000 billion websites in the world.

      That’s pretty incredible for niche blog about Autism.

      I had just started selling ad space and some spots were selling for hundreds of dollars a month. I had just begun allowing the site to generate revenue after trying to put it off cause people hates ads.

      Shortly after that, Lizze left and I sorta fell apart for awhile. I stopped writing and simply taking 14 days off while I was thinking about how to move forward, my ranking tanked.

      It’s so hard to get there and so easy to lose it.

      I made a bad business decision by killing off Lost and Tired but I needed the closure and wanted to remove her story from the mix because it just didn’t feel right anymore.

      In August, I started over. In only a few months I’m rapidly regaining lost traffic and my rankings are getting much better as well.

      I’ve got ads in place now and I’m working with a few companies on on going ad or sponsored post deals. Unfortunately, they don’t care where you were, they care where you are. I’m not quite there yet.

      That being said, I do have sponsored ads in place that do allow the site to pay for itself and then some but if I don’t reach a certain amount per month, I don’t get paid that month. It rolls over into the next month and then I get paid the following month.

      It’s on these months that I run into problems with the site paying for itself. That being said, things are looking better and better each month, I just need to keep at it.

      If I have 1,000 unique visitors a day and 10 people visit a sponsor, that could maybe amount to $15 for the day. If I could do that every day, that’s hundreds a month and that in combination with a couple other things I have in the works, allows me to do pretty okay.

      It’s not glamorous or perfect but I can pay the bills and maybe take the kids to dinner or the occasional movie. It’s a solution that works.

      Sometimes what happens is that things come up and I can’t absorb the loss without a ripple effect.. I don’t have a savings account. Some of these things that happen are just life and some are the result of decisions made by other people that can still have a significant impact, even though they’re gone.

      When I say decent living, I simply mean making ends meet. I realize that’s not what everyone else may define it as but my kids are happy. The stressors in their lives are things that no amount of money can fix and I can’t change.

      I understand where you’re coming from Kim and I want you to know that I really appreciate your approach. I feel guilty enough on my own but regardless of what people on the Internet think, I’m doing everything I can. There is no simple fix and I’ve worked with family council, the boys doctors, my family and what’s left of my support system elsewhere and there is no fix that doesn’t create larger problems elsewhere.

      These are people physically in my life with intimate knowledge that I can’t always share here and we can’t find a working solution.

      I’m doing the best that I can with what I have to work with. Guardian Locate is getting ready to launch and that’s hugely positive.

      Thanks again Kim ☺

  4. One of the challenges of writing a personal blog is the balancing act of preserving some privacy while at the same time providing enough information that keeps the everyday reader coming back. That’s not easy. I think in this blog’s case, that problem is compounded by the fact that the blog, in large part, is more of a stream of consciousness, “as it’s happening in real time” sort of endeavor rather than a carefully constructed, meticulously drafted series of pieces. That’s not a criticism, that’s just an observation as to the style of this blog as opposed to some others. Anyway, a blog written in such a format risks confusing the reader at times, since some information is given out peacemeal and not is necessarily a full expression of a complete idea. A perfect example lies within this post and has been picked up on already – your apparent financial difficulties versus your claims that this blog can support you. You’ve elaborated on that in addressing the comments, but I think this is the kind of stuff, left unexplained, that can be frustrating for some readers to digest and may lead to some comments which demonstrate that frustration.
    That being said, some people’s comments are unnecessarily cruel or hurtful. That’s obviously not necessary and they should simply be ignored.
    Keep doing what you’re doing.

    • That was brilliantly put. I think you hit the nail on the head. I can take some responsibility for that because readers that followed me from Lost and Tired, probably know already that in some ways, this is like a personal journal for me. That’s how it helps me to process things.

      Sometimes it’s in real time, other times it’s sorta me going over things after the fact.

      I’ve been told that the reason so many people benefit from this is because of that writing style. It’s raw and real and sorta in the moment.

      I’d like to get back to some more of the carefully thought out, multiple drafts kinda things as well but that’s harder for me sometimes.

      Anyway, thank you so much for put what I was trying to say into words. ☺

  5. Rob, I have a major complaint about the post about your water being cut off. It got ‘Bills’ by Lunchmoney Lewis stuck in my head.

    Seriously though, I think it’s brave to post what you do. I also think that it’s okay for the kids to go a few days without handy running water – I work for an energy provider and people these days act like the world will end if they have to find a way to function without a utility for a few days. Your kids will grow up hardier and more adaptable for a few things like this shaking it up.

    Also, people need to read your entire blog including Lost and Tired before they make judgemental comments, because some of them are insanely wrong, like the one accusing you of being too proud to use foodbanks when you have publicly posted when you’ve used them in the past and talked about how there’s no shame in it!

    • Thank you.. I don’t think it’s a CPS issue or even traumatic for the kids. Yes, I failed to make the payment on time. Yes, sharing that opens me up to scrutiny.

      Here’s the thing. I can only control so much and when something like this happens, I try to make it a positive thing for the kids.

      There’s no running water to flush the toilet? Did you know that roughly a gallon of water, poured directly into the toilet bowl will make it flush? These are all things that they can use in their life and that’s what I want them to take away from an experience like that.

      Not having heat in the winter is a problem for many reasons but that’s not what we were talking about.

      Thank You for you well written and kind words…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *