Emmett won’t be going to see his Mom this weekend

Emmett stayed home from school today because he’s got a cough and is running a fever. 

I’ve talked to his Mom a couple of times today and we both agree that while she’s going to miss him and I’m going miss my one night off every two weeks, he needs to stay home and rest. 


I was hoping as the day went on, he’d feel better but it’s just not happening.  I’m unsure of how Elliott’s going to react to this turn of events because these two tend to not like being separated.

While I’ve said before, I don’t agree with much of what the boys Mom has done, is doing or probably will do and some of you have read about her feelings towards me, we can still put that aside and do what’s best for the boys. 

She knows without question that I would never maliciously withhold the boys from her and that if I feel that one of the boys is too sick to come visit, they’re too sick to come visit. 

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While I will never again be friends with her because too much has happened that makes that impossible for me, at least for now anyways, there’s still the ability to set all our personal feelings aside, when it comes to the boys. 

I’m not saying this for any other reason than to illustrate that even though there are significant personal issues between parents both during and after divorce, you still have to do your best to work together and do right by your kids.

In most cases, it’s not impossible to make these things work. It’s not going to always be easy. It takes time, patience, effort and a willingness to set your personal feelings aside, long enough to make rational decisions together, for the betterment of

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I do feel very lucky that we have thus far been able to do that and I am fully committed to continuing down that path,  as I know she is also. ☺

Please don’t take this post out of context because it’s meant to deliver a positive message, aside from Emmett being sick..

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  1. Kim Gebhardt

    You’re doing the right thing by letting him stay with you if he’s not feeling well. I can’t imagine that camping out in the living room at Grandma’s is fun when you’re sick.

    Question- are kids with IEP’s allowed to miss more school than kids who don’t have an IEP? I ask because in my state, kids have to attend school a certain number of days if they want to be passed on to the next grade, and Emmett has missed a lot of school so far this year. Just a curiosity.

    Hope he’s feeling better soon.

    1. Thanks Kim. That’s a good question.. I have no idea, although his absences are all excused. It’s the unexplained or unexcused that are a problem.. I’m not sure what you consider a lot of missed days.

      I think he’s missed 7 days this year. Elliott’s missed 10 but the bulk of both of them was when they had that respiratory bug before Thanksgiving….

      I don’t know if that’s a lot but I guess I didn’t feel it was…

      1. Kim Gebhardt

        I guess a doctor’s note would take care of any potential issues. As for how many is too many, I think 7 and 10 is excessive, but it is entirely possible that I’m wrong about that. I can only go by friends and family as I don’t have kids in school. I saw the report cards for my friend’s two girls the other day and one hasn’t missed any days for the year and the other has missed 2 days because of ear infections. That’s pretty much my basis for comparison.

        Like I said, I may well be wrong. : )

      2. Kim Gebhardt

        After posting my last reply I remembered that you posted Elliott’s report card a couple of weeks ago. As of the date of that report card, he had already missed 13 days this year, and his teacher even made comment in the remarks that he needs to attend school daily. I think that’s a good indication that the boys have more absences than you think they do. I can see how you’d lose track; you have 3 kids and it’s a lot to keep everything straight for them, from meds to appointments to school.

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