After a long night with Mr. Elliott, I’m feeling a bit rundown today. The weather is even shittier than yesterday because we went from warm and rainy to freezing.
Lizze is paying a price as a result and that price is high.
The boys are hanging out with their grandparents for a little bit today. This gives Lizze and I break that we definitely need.
I’m using this down time to figure some things out. The last three weeks have been tough. We basically went from a week of everyone being sick, to a short week at school, to Spring break.
We’ve been facing some temporary financial hardships again and of course the car has been down this week as well. Very little about life has been easy.
My weight-loss journey hit a detour, as noticed my one of my readers on myfitnesspal, but I’m determined to get things back on track.
I’m responsible for my choices and I’m not going to make an excuse for my bad ones. I do however, want to explain how hard this is at times, especially when the stress in the house is through the roof.
I absolutely own my poor food choices and that’s something I’m working on.
Something else is becoming an obstacle again, and that’s depression. These last few weeks have been tough and I’m worn out. I feel like my depression is taking full advantage and rearing its ugly head again. My lack of motivation, energy and positivity, are evidence of that.
I’m still doing all I need to do to properly manage my depression like, counseling, medication and exercise. Admittedly, I’m not getting enough exercise but I’m doing better in that regard.
Depression is one of those things that likes to kick you when you’re down or at your weakest, most vulnerable moments. I’m not sure if there’s anything that can cure depression and prevent it from popping up for time to time. Since my teens, this is how things have gone for me.
At the moment, most of my life feels incredibly overwhelming. That’s not really a surprise but it’s the extent in which I’m overwhelmed, that is a problem.
Even things like making a smoothie seem like monumental tasks that I don’t have the energy for. That’s what depression does to me and I end up discouraged.
What I need to do.. What I will do is refocuse things again. Rather than dwell on what I feel I’m doing wrong, I’m going to feel proud of the things I’ve done right and the efforts I’ve made. I realize it’s more complicated than that but hopefully you get the picture.
Again, none of these things are excuses but they are obstacles in my way and it’s important to recognize that.
Maybe we can help each other. Friend me on myfitnesspal and we can follow each other’s journey. My user name is theautismdad….. ☺