This post began as a response to a comment I received today but took on a life of its own. I’m not upset or offended by the comment but I did want to address a few things and hopefully provide a little more insight into things on my end.
The comment in question raised concerns about my financial situation and made reference to our gas being turned off for months. The situation with losing our house was mentioned as well as how unfair it is for the kids to live in a house without hot water.
I know this person and they truly mean well, so I’m not upset and they did raise some valid points that perhaps others were wondering as well.
Let me address these things one at a time.
The situation with the natural gas
It’s believe it’s only about 1 month (give or take) since our gas was turned off and while that’s still not good, I’m doing the very best I can. The only time it’s really an issue is showering or bathing but frankly, there are workarounds for this.
I’m working to get this fixed but it’s proving to be challenging.
The situation with losing the house
I came very close to losing our house but things have improved on that front. Help became available when I least expected it and it was nothing short of a blessing.
For the record, I had to make a choice between saving the house or turning the gas back on. I felt that the kids having a home was the priority.
The boys living in a house with no hot water is not fair to them
It’s not, you’re absolute right.
That being said, very little about the kids lives are fair. It’s not fair that they have challenges that impact their daily life. It’s not fair that Emmett has to endure these fever flares again. It’s not fair that Gavin’s emotional/physical health is so fragile that he can’t attend school.
It’s not fair that Gavin has to have needles stuck in his belly twice a week, in order to infuse a donated immune system into his body so he can survive.
It’s not fair that their Mom walked out. It’s not fair that their family has fallen a part. It’s not fair that everything they knew has been stripped away from them.
It’s not fair that they witnessed their van being stolen from in front of our house. It’s not fair that our neighborhood isn’t safe to play in.
I could go on and on because there are so many things that aren’t fair.
The reality of the situation
The truth is that our lives aren’t always pretty and they certainly aren’t perfect. You can choose to read about it but we have no choice but to live it.
I made the choice a long time ago not to get swallowed up by all the negative things in my life. Let me tell you what, that’s not always easy.
I share things honestly because my hope is that my experiences can help or provide comfort to someone out there who’s going through something similar. I could sugar coat the bad but who would that help?
A concerted effort is put forth each day to focus on the positive. I believe that it’s important to find the positive in challenging situations because it helps me maintain perspective and stay centered.
Today was a good example of this.
I hadn’t planned on buying Emmett new shoes after only a couple of months but he starts school in the morning and has refused to wear shoes for most of the summer because he’s not tolerating the feeling well right now.
Spending money I really didn’t have today was not a positive thing but finding Emmett shoes that he is willing to wear because they don’t bother his feet is enormously positive and can’t be overstated. The time and money involved in finding Emmett new shoes was totally worth it.
Here’s the reality. I’m a 24/7 caregiver who gets less than 48 hours off a month. I’m only one person and quite frankly, I’m pretty damn proud of how well I’m managing. It’s far from perfect but I challenge anyone to step into my shoes and do a better job.
For those concerned about the boys and I, there’s a really easy way you can help, if you’d like to help.
Like and Share my posts. Visit the sponsors of this site and check out what they have to offer. You don’t have to buy or sign up for anything for it to help… That’s a great way to support my efforts for the community and help me provide for my family, all at the same time.
In regards to the pink elephant in the room, I have chosen not to talk about the boy’s Mother, aside from superficial things like visitations. This blog is dedicated to the new journey that the boys and I are on together.
Anything that I have said or will say are all things the boys know about first hand. There are things they don’t know about and I don’t want them reading about it here. I don’t do this to protect their Mother, I’m doing it to protect them.
It makes it hard to put things in context sometimes but I would hope that you as a reader, would understand that there is a rhyme and reason for everything I do.