I called an emergency meeting of Elliott’s IEP team for today and this is what’s going to happen

This morning I have a very, very important meeting at the school in regards to Elliott

I’m making changes to his medication but the issues at school are not that simple and that change alone isn’t enough. 

I really like the school and the majority of the staff. 


That being said and with the knowledge that some of the staff frequently read the blog, I have to be honest and voice my concerns. 

It’s important to note that having concerns about a teachers approach to educating children on the Autism Spectrum isn’t a negative reflection on the school.  I would feel very comfortable saying that even the best school aren’t perfect. 

What does reflect on the school is how they handle the concerns of a parent when they’re brought up. 

I’m going into this with an open mind because I really do like the school. 

This has honestly been a long time coming because some of these things need address in an IEP setting.

Here’s an example of one the concerns I have. 

Elliott came home from school on Thursday frustrated because his teacher gave him homework over the long weekend.  Not only did she give him homework over the long weekend but it was homework that he missed 2 months ago when he was sick, right around Thanksgiving. 

First of all, I’m over the homework thing and I’m putting a stop to it. 

Read This  The boys will be at their overnight visit with their Mom

Secondly, why would you give a child already struggling, homework that he missed 2 months ago, especially when homework doesn’t count for anything?

Elliott’s a ticking panic attack on many days and stuff like this pushes him over the edge. 

There’s a break somewhere because if you’re going to educate kids with Autism, you have to have a basic understanding of what makes them tick. 

Here’s a news flash, you can’t treat all kids with Autism the same because they all have different needs, weaknesses and strengths. 

That’s Autism 101.

I get that we want our kids to be responsible.  I get that we want them to be challenged but at the same time, our expectations must be reasonable for the child in question. 

Maybe some kids on the spectrum do fine with homework but that certainly doesn’t mean they all do.  In fact, while I’ve spoken to some parents who are fine with homework because their child does okay with it, I’ve spoken to many, many more parents who hate homework because it puts too much stress on their child and creates major problems at home. 

My goal with tomorrow’s meeting is to identify what the problems are, what we can do to help him and abolish homework permanently.

I don’t care if I have to add it to his IEP but it stops. 

Whatever doesn’t get done at school, will get done the next day.  It will not be done at home. 

Read This  It feels like a pretty successful morning

I’m not trying to give Elliott a free pass but he struggles to make it through the day at school.   When he comes home, he needs that time to regroup and prepare for the next day. 

That’s going to be the long and short of it. 

Dr. Pattie is attending because she’s going to ensure Elliott’s needs are met. 

I honestly don’t anticipate there being a problem.  The school has always been very receptive, especially with the approach I take. 

We’re a team and this team’s sole purpose is to help Elliott reach his full potential.  I’m not afraid to butt heads if necessary but I’ve never really had a situation here where that’s been needed. 

I’m a little on edge for a couple reasons but I’m really frustrated with this whole thing and I’ll say that my fuse might be a little shorter than normal. 


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  1. tannawings

    The purpose of homework is to keep a child’s mind on task, to reinforce something they learned in the classroom, some will even argue it is also a way to get parents involved. Perhaps that homework given from 2 months ago is something he is now struggling with in school and is/was a building block to something else.

    I am glad to hear Dr Pattie is attending- you are very very lucky to have a therapist willing to do that in person. Perhaps everyone can brainstorm a way to make things work for Elliot and to keep him on track academically.

    shockwave plugin is killi ng me on your site tonight. Good luck tomorrow!!!

    1. I’m not sure about the Shockwave issues, I can reproduce the issue. If you can provide what browser, OS ect, that you’re using, I can try and troubleshoot.

      As for the rest, please look to my response to Kim above. ☺

          1. tannawings

            its working fine tonight, I think it was a chrome hiccup. I had never had it happen here as you dont have a lot of animated junk on here that causes things to act up. Pretty sure it was chrome.

  2. Kim Gebhardt

    I’m curious, with every student having an IEP, how do students not fall behind? If Elliott is no longer given homework, doesn’t that put him at risk of falling behind the rest of the class? And then I also have to wonder what happens to those kids who do the homework and are ahead… don’t they get bored? It seems like an unwinnable situation for teachers and students alike. You’ve mentioned before that your kids thrive on structure and are creatures of habit, would it make a difference if homework was scheduled for the same time every day? That the only thing happening from say, 4 to 4:30 was homework? I also worry that if he doesn’t have to do homework now, will he ever have to do it? At some point won’t it be a requirement?

    Also, on an unrelated note, I’m having the same shockwave problems that tannawings seems to be having.

    1. You have some good points. It’s a little different for kids on the spectrum because there are very hard limits sometimes and pushing past them can produce major issues.

      I’m far from the only Autism parent that has this problem. Even speaking with his psychiatrist yesterday, homework just doesn’t work for many kids on the spectrum.

      That being said, there’s a difference between hard limits and just not wanting to do the work.

      Elliott falls somewhere in the middle and so we have to try a modified approach. We can’t allow manipulation and because he’s physically capable of doing the work, there’s emotional barriers and control issues to work with.
      I’ll share what we decided to do a bit later. I haven’t really stopped since about 730 this morning. I’m just waiting for our turn at Dr. Patties and wanted to catch up on some comments.

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