No Regrets: Trading One Dream For Another



Seeing my old shirt brought back so many memories, so I wish I could forget. I experienced things during that time in my life that I’ve never been able to shake. There were lives I couldn’t save and images that will never leave me. I’m actually starting to dig into some of this at therapy because I’ve carried a great of pain and guilt for far too long.

I wish I could have been able manage both parts of my life in a way that didn’t require me to make a choice of one or the other.

At the end of the day, I made my choice and I can live with it. Sometimes, it becomes necessary to give up one dream in order to attain another. For me, I gave up my career in order to be what my family needed me to be.

I would never give up my family for anything. While being a fire medic is in my blood, part of who I am and I do miss it, there’s more to me than this one part. I’ve been able to be in my kids life every single day. Being a Dad is a privilege and an awesome responsibility. It’s something I take very seriously and I would give up anything for my kids. There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for them.

I’ve found ways to make a difference and be the Dad my kids need me to be. This blog is testiment to that.

Writing allows me to help people and be the full time caregiver/Dad my kids need me to be. I’d choose my family over a career a million times over. While it’s true that I miss parts of my old life, and finding this shirt reminded me how much I miss it, I have absolutely no regrets.

It’s not been easy but at the end of my life, I can look back and know that I was always there for my kids. I was able to watch them grow up every single day. I was able to be there for everything and I wouldn’t trade that for anything in the world.

It’s crazy how something like Elliott rummaging through some drawers and finding a shirt, can take me back in time.

I can now look at this shirt, remember what it means, spend time in the memories and smile, rather than be sad.

2 comments

    • Curtis G. on April 30, 2020 at 5:27 pm
    • Reply

    You’re still doing what you did way back when. You are helping a lot of people, including your children, with your blog, your podcasts, your being a human being that gives honest advice and a window into your personal life that helps a great many people involved in this autism world, many who you will never know or are aware of. You may not work with the fire department anymore but you are still helping a lot of people in the field of autism. I salute you for being who you are to your sons, your audience and who you are as a father, a man and a human being. I also detoured from a path I was on to devote myself to my autistic son. I understand fully what you are talking about.

  1. Thank you for sharing this.

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