I’m massively depressed and I need help

This maybe my last post for a few days. I have a new pod recorded and ready to go but I need to finish the artwork first. Hopefully, that will go live tomorrow sometime..

My oral surgery is scheduled for 8:30 am on Friday. I’m struggling quite a bit right now and at this point, that struggle runs much deeper than simply facing my fears of having my wisdom teeth removed.

On the surface, I know it’s not a huge deal and I’m not entirely sure why it’s considered major surgery but it sure feels like a huge deal.

As a small child, I had a very traumatic experience involving the oral surgeon. I had a tooth ripped out by our family dog and surgically reimplanted. I wasn’t properly anesthetized and I was restrained (probably cause I wasn’t super cooperative at the time). I felt everything they did until I was finally knocked out.

That spawned a phobia of the dentist and a 25 year period of time that I never went back to the dentist.

I overcame that fear a few months and I’m good now. After 25 years, I only needed to have a previous filling replaced but I did discover I need to lose my wisdom teeth.

My oral surgeon is an old friend and he’s amazing, so I’m in good hands. It’s just the idea of facing that fear that’s pretty much broken me.

I spoke at length with our family therapist this week and I’ve come to a realization. It doesn’t make me happy to admit this but right now, I’m not happy anyway.

As it stands, I’m simply not winning my longstanding war with depression. In fact, it’s getting so bad that I’m just not coping with anything. I know that a large part of this is my pending surgery but truthfully, it will be something else later.

My life is chronically stressful. I’m talking seriously, seriously stressful and that’s not likely to change anytime soon, if ever.

I cope really well until I don’t and then I simply begin to crumble. There’s no way to predict where my upper limit is but I seem to continuously keep hitting it and that’s not okay.

I’m so overwhelmed that I almost can’t function and that’s a major problem because so many people are relying on me. As it is, Friday is like a wall and I can’t see anything passed it. I know life continues on the other side but I can’t see it right now and that scares me.


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  1. Rob! Please don’t give into it! I don’t know what it’s like to be in your shoes, but as a fellow autism parent & blogger I can relate. Some days I feel like I can take on the world & then next thing you know I’m cleaning up an epic disaster at home & boom-I’m down again. My only advice to you is to continue to seek help. Family therapists are fab, but for depression you need to see a shrink. (I do & I’m not ashamed to admit it:)) Also, be aware that some (maybe all) pain meds that you may receive for your surgery will bring you down. Or UP then back down. Mood Swing Style. Not at all suggesting that you skip the meds…if they prescribe them then you need them…just know they can affect your depression!:) Best of Luck! I’m pulling for you.

    1. Thanks Heather.. Great to hear from you. I do see a psychologist but my PCP manages my meds. We have a serious shortage of psychiatrists in our area. I’m in good hands when I need help. Your advice is well received and much appreciated.. ☺ Hope all is well on your end…

  2. But i don’t understand why i’m depressed.

  3. I can relate, recently. I had a bad flu, my headache and joint pains lasted for solid 3 days, despi… https://t.co/N7aHYjc4j2

  4. Enjoy your breath…steal moments, a few mins at least, to meditate (traditionally, or just go outs… https://t.co/VpSSyHJQpA

  5. Hang in there Rob. Sometimes the best we can do is put one foot in front of the other. Know you a… https://t.co/SOkD3omIkc

  6. Been there many times. Most don’t understand how hard it is. Just take it one day at a time. Tom… https://t.co/yww4H3pSml

  7. Hello Rob. This makes uncomfortable reading and my thoughts are genuinely with you. I’m sure you’re… https://t.co/BTCn64vzRO

  8. Don’t give up. Don’t. Your child will suffer forever if you do. Each day is new and can bring amazi… https://t.co/hodhGJHR3P

    • S on March 22, 2019 at 3:25 am
    • Reply

    You need to see your doctor definitely and a therapist. Things really aren’t as bad as it may feel. I totally get worrying about being there for your child. I too worry. You have many people there for you, lean on them. I really hope things get better for you!

  9. ❤️ I’m here for ya man. I have been fighting a daily battle with severe depression for almost 14 years

  10. Take Siberian Ginseng & fell happy, add on some Vitamin B12 complex too & see the result, mingle wi… https://t.co/ls3nmIJnRD

  11. Hang in there, Rob…. Sending love.

  12. I’ll be praying for you. You sound like such a giving loving person and father. The winter has been… https://t.co/NlWOY8gIXc

  13. I am sorry you are going through a hard time. Glad you sought help. That’s so important. When… https://t.co/NzER4MQRaW

  14. Please when it gets the darkest, turn to your love be and that will remind you, and all of use, why… https://t.co/rcZffR6XzK

    • Diane on March 21, 2019 at 5:00 pm
    • Reply

    Thinking of you and praying for you.

  15. Prayers that you are able to figure out what needs done for you.

  16. Please ask for help-from family, neighbors, co-workers.There’s a lot on your shoulders & maybe some… https://t.co/dES4w4tLNy

  17. Hey Rob. I hear you about everything being too much. Your plate of worries is overflowing and with… https://t.co/ubd3yUDRhO

  18. Thank you for your honesty about your struggles. You are not alone, and by sharing, you help others… https://t.co/hMzFFmW0AC

  19. Your words resonate with me so much. I’m going through similar struggles with depression…trying t… https://t.co/ALUl3fkUPB

  20. You got it. If this helps I am on board.

  21. Please get some tangible support to help you with your daily struggles. You can do this ❤️

  22. You are not alone. There are times our fears own us. Please do not let the depression win — not for… https://t.co/JhE8YcktSn

  23. You are not alone. Depression lies. Revisit your Twitter feed to help remind you of the good things… https://t.co/HUIc1wzlXd

  24. I am sorry for how you are feeling….I have severe depression and anxiety and ADD and “possibly a bipolar trait.” I’m 46 and 4 months ago, I think we have finally gotten my meds down so that I don’t find myself at times feeling like i’m about to fall off a ledge. What helped me was finally finding a GOOD psychiatrist. he also has a son with Autism (I have 3 sons, two with autism, all three with anxiety) so he can identify with me with regards to how challenging and emotionally draining it can be. Additionally, I have been in recovery for alcoholism for 7 years. Sobriety has helped my depression and anxiety.
    For me, all things mentioned are what help me stay stable emotionally and psychologically.
    I hope you can find some long term relief from the downs……I know it sucks. hang in there!

  25. I can relate to a LOT of whar you just said. Remember that you are not alone.

  26. You are absolutely right. Taking care of yourself helps you take better care of them.

    It’s ok to take a break. I’ve found when there’s something major, sometimes you just have to ride the wave so to speak and be ok with not doing more than survival. Sometimes it seems like survival mode never ends. I don’t know if this will help you. In my experience, focusing on my breathing can help me calm. And if that’s all you do today to get to your big day tomorrow, that’s ok.

    I also remind myself God is bigger than my stressful life. I will pray for strength for you to make it through today.

  27. Trust me. You don’t know me, I get it and I REALLY CARE!!! If I was rich, I’d pay for a live in N… https://t.co/rr3x7g84iU

  28. @Merry_Mary47 Rob? What’s going on, honey? You have such a Big Burden to bear, w/3 Autistic childre… https://t.co/JvftMSkgaG

  29. Stay strong bro. I understand what you are going through. Maybe not everything but trust me, I ha… https://t.co/Vo7FlfLALx

  30. You can always message me, Rob. I too struggle with depression and all the things that come with it… https://t.co/5tlbtyxbZV

  31. 2. Daily assistance for the boys via their insurance or grants?
    3. Any thoughts of starting a go fu… https://t.co/jgeesVzX4R

  32. #1 of 2
    I don’t face your daily challenges but I understand depression. Have had it for about 60 ye… https://t.co/RaPaRCNFUc

  33. I’ve been there. Life is hard enough. Being a parent of special needs kids is a lot on so many leve… https://t.co/FeIFx78Pim

  34. Rob start a power walking program ASAP, same time everyday, & if you can, get a personal trainer at… https://t.co/6SgytlgZ40

  35. I love all you guys. Please don’t be offended that I posted this. Please reach out if you need to.… https://t.co/iGvwbIC188

  36. I’m glad that u r getting help. Here r things that help me. I wish u well. https://t.co/0RIqUj1kDg

  37. @MicheleNtmitch After one of my relationships ended in an extremely poor ways I lost hope and all s… https://t.co/68IFkrMaiM

  38. @MicheleNtmitch There is a way out of this. It’s impossible to objectively see when your brain chem… https://t.co/zqSnI0KclQ

  39. I was in a battle like this for months last year and all my GP Doctor kept telling me was ”grow up… https://t.co/DXCOwFgo8x

    • M on March 21, 2019 at 12:24 am
    • Reply

    Reach out to someone you trust. Sharing extreme feelings, good or bad, helps you to ease the burden… https://t.co/pHGQrkY6wC

  40. I’ve been taking Vitamin B complex vitamins. It gives you energy and helps the nervous system. Also… https://t.co/LwbXkD0PUg

  41. I had a bad experience with a dentist in high school. Nerve damage left me unable to smile when I g… https://t.co/YBggrT9As7

  42. Read this book. It’s short and will lift you. It’s not religious. You’ve got to get out of your hea… https://t.co/PP3jbKtiuC

  43. I read your last post about the surgery. Why not postpone it for a little while. Try to get yoursel… https://t.co/d3x9VJ0Ooe

  44. If you ever need to vent to another parent who’s raised a child on the autism spectrum, feel free.… https://t.co/gYaMAWygY2

  45. Do you need someone to talk to? DM me!

  46. Retweeting is not getting help. Do you have a therapist you can contact?

  47. Please hold on.

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