If you have been following this blog for awhile, you should know but maybe could use a reminder, that this is blog is like a personal journal for me. It’s therapy for me. Sometimes I just need to vent and I’ve been needing that more frequently as of late. It is what it is and I’m not trying to be doom and gloom. The reality is that my life and the lives of my 3 kids are impossibly difficult right now. We can’t seem to catch a break and it’s been one traumatic experience after another for the last year or so.
There are days that it gets to me more than others. There are days I just want to fucking scream but there are also days like today where I’m treading water.
I guess the point is this. This blog is meant to be a glimpse into my life. I share the good, bad and ugly. Right now, life is much more challenging and I’m struggling more often. I’m not angling for sympathy and I’m sorry if it’s coming across that way. I would honestly write the same way, even if no one read it.
This is a process for me and I allow you a look behind the curtain. It’s not always pretty because life is sometimes messy.
If reading my personal experience is unpleasant for you, please feel free not to read. I’m totally okay with that. If on the other hand, you find value in this, please share it with those who might benefit.
Anyway, I’m exhausted and desperately in need of sleep. I’m so grateful to everyone who’s reached out to ask how I’m doing or how the kids are doing. The means so much to me and helps me feel a little less forgotten.
I’m very lucky to have such a supportive family. My parents calls me almost every day. They just want to make sure I’m okay and the kids are okay. There’s nothing anyone can do to lighten my load right now or for the forseeable future. The boys and I have to remain isolated in order to protect Gavin, as well as oursleves. That’s just the way it is. It’s not easy on anyone, but it’s especially difficult for the boys. They miss Lizze, their grandparents and their friends. Lizze and I decided when this all began, that visits would have to stop for the duration. It’s a big sacrifice but it’s best for everyone involved. I’m grateful that we can still work as a team.
There’s nothing we can do about any of this right now, as it’s outside of our control.
My main goal is to get the kids through this, while ensuring their physical and emotional wellbeing. That’s not an easy task.
For now, this is all I have to say. I truly hope this finds you doing well. I hope you and your family are safe and healthy. I’m off to bed now. Thanks for listening.
On a side note.
This was meant to publish last night. I was too tired to finish and send it. Better late than never. ☺
Rob, do you have links to your 2 interviews? I’d like to hear them. And I hear you about how hard this is. Harder for you with three children. I had plans this year after my knee surgeries, and now are more difficult. But really, the goal is to stay alive through this not very sexy disaster.
Are you referring to the ABC and BBC stuff? If so, I don’t have access to the BBC segment, although I never asked. The ABC is pinned to my Twitter profile. twitter.com/theautismdad…☺
Amen Becky. I hope you and you’re are staying safe. ☺
Can you put masks on the kids and take them out for a remote walk in an area away from other people? It’s hard for kids to be indoors for 37 days straight. I understand not being around people, but there is nothing wrong with being outdoors.
It’s not quite that simple. We live in a bad neighborhood and my oldest, who’s immunocompromised, is not comfortable leaving the house. We can go into the yard sometimes but just as the most recent example, the was an attempted murder last week, roughly 2 doors down and it happened while we were outside. This guy poured gasoline all over a car, and set it on fire, with his girlfriend inside the car. We got to witness that because we were simply out in our yard.
My hands are tied in many ways right now. Yes, I know it’s had for kids to be in the house for 37 days but my options are limited and my priorities have to center around safety. I’m trying to get Gavin to be willing to just go for a drive but he’s not budging.
Most days I have been okay, but not so much today.
Well said Rob and should be easily understood, especially by parents on lock down with autistic children and if they were in your personal situation. You all stay safe and do the best you can, as we all are forced to, under these terrible situation the world now finds itself in. That’s all any of us can do until this madness passes.