The boys and I have been on lockdown for a total of 50 days today. When you think about that, it’s crazy. 50 days of not going anywhere and not having contact with anyone outside of ourselves.
I feel Ike this is a pretty big milestone and we should recognize that.
It’s not uncommon for me to beat myself up for my shortcomings, of which I feel there are many. Things are challenging and I believe I should be doing better. I can’t tell you how many times I feel like I’m failing my kids. Those feeling will probably always be there, at least to some degree.
The truth is, my job is difficult and the reality is, all things considered, I’m sorta kicking ass.
It’s not perfect because I’m not perfect but there were four of us when we went into lockdown on March 6th and there are four of us 50 days later. I’m guiding three Autistic kids, including one who’s immunocompromised, through a global health crisis. As I said, all things considered, I’m doing a pretty fucking awesome job.
I’m not accomplishing everything I’d like to, especially in regards to work. Bringing in an income is very challenging right now. That being said, I’ve managed to keep my kids safe and healthy during the worst global pandemic of the last century. That has to count for something. I should definitely give myself some points for that.