Why we aren’t involving one of our kids in the funeral today

We’re going to be leaving is a little bit to drop Gavin off at my parents house. We’ve made the choice to not bring him, even to the luncheon and we’ve done that for a couple of reasons.

The biggest reason is that he’s Schizophrenic and Autistic. Emotionally charged environments are very destabilizing for him. It doesn’t matter if the emotion is joy or sadness. It’s not something he can process.

He won’t get sad or depressed by these event but he will likely experience more hallucinations and that’s not good.

WebMD
For people with schizophrenia, stress can trigger symptoms.

Gavin’s already struggling with new voices and his medication situation is delicate. Basically, we don’t want to take any chances that this will push him over the edge.



The second reason we are opting not to bring him is that he has no filter and I mean no filter. He verbalizes whatever thoughts pop into his head. There have been a few doozies this week in regards to Lizze Grandmother passing.

He doesn’t mean them in a bad way but his words still have an impact and would be both hurtful and offensive.

It’s family and I’m sure most would understand but we would feel the need to sit on him the entire time and today is going to be hard enough without having to do that.

One of these two reasons is justification enough not to bring him but combine them, and we know we’re making the best decision we can in the this particular situation.

This is just another example how being a Special Needs parent can make life more challenging. The decisions aren’t easy and not everyone will agree with them but we have to do what we feel is best for him. Sometimes we have to also factor in what’s best for everyone else as well.

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